“Aww,” Ella and I say in unison.
Bro kept his cards close to his chest, but the way he moved said it all. He cut off being outside to be with her.
Ring a bell?
“What’s got you acting like I’m that lady with the couch?”Smack. “Ow! He called me, sweetheart. Obviously something happened,” he says. “No more self-defense classes with Erica. I know you’re giving Levi hell.”
“She went on a date. A second date, with Dickhead,” I mutter. I fill them in on Doe and her almost-boss. She’s never hinted about liking him. Did I miss the clues?
“Something ain’t right with him,” I say. “Dude looks like GhostfromPower.”
“He can’t be trusted. What?” Ella sucks her teeth. “What role has he played where he’s not causing trauma?Being Mary Jane.”
“For Colored Girls.” I shudder.
“I’m not staying on the phone going over that man’s résumé,” Julian snaps. “The point, Antonio.”
“The point is, I don’t know what to do! I like her. Hell, I love her.”
“Aww,” Ella says.
“I just…” I sigh. “This is all new to me. I’ve tried to ignore what I feel, but I can’t stop thinking about her. I told myself we’re better off as friends, but that doesn’t feel right. We’ve been…intimate. Notthat, but yeah.”
“Bro.” There’s a smile in Julian’s tone.Smack. “I can’t be happy for my friend now? He’s loved this woman since middle school and is finally admitting it.”
“Have you told her how you feel?”
“No, El.” I blow out a breath. “The last two times we were around each other, we didn’t exactly talk. I don’t know how to get her to see me differently.”
“Show her,” Julian says.
“I do! She’s the only woman I talk to on the phone willingly. I took her shopping for house supplies. I painted. I rented a VIP suite in a Vegas club so she could come out and not get overstimulated. I made friendship bracelets.”
“Now that’s cute,” Ella swoons.
“I don’t know what else to do, and I don’t want to lose her.”
There it is, what I’ve been so afraid to admit out loud. I’m so far out of my element with Miriam, it scares the shit out of me.
“Tell her how you feel, but show her that the non-platonic side of you can be loyal and love her how she needs to be loved. Reassure her that taking your friendship to that level doesn’t come with your track record in the streets. El wasn’t around to see how I used to get down.”
“Thank God!” she huffs.
Julian snickers. “Miriam needs to know it’s safe to love you outside of the boundaries of your friendship. Your actions need to follow your words. That means no sides.”
“Bro, I haven’t been with another woman since she moved up here. The carpal tunnel in my—”
“Too much!” Julian and Ella say.
I drag a hand over my face. “You know what I mean. I’m serious.”
Julian’s tone lightens. “Sounds like it. You’ve been pining for her for almost two decades now. If you want her, go for it. Just give her the space to process. You’re on her time now, and you have to respect whatever decision she makes. Ella tried to go on a date once. I shut that shit down.”Smack.“Ow!”
“You did no such thing,” Ella snickers. “The date was awful, but Julie ordered me tacos all the way from London to make up for it.”
“I’d do it again, sweetheart.”
Not again.
