Her phone dinged and she reached across the bed and looked at the screen to see a cartoon image of a shrew sitting ona hill of devoured crawly creatures, its stomach bloated from overindulgence, its razor-sharp teeth with insect bits hanging between them.
She threw back her head laughing.
“This man is anidiot!” she said, burrowing deeper beneath the blankets before sending him a picture of William Shakespeare’sThe Taming of the Shrew followed by “A real shrew will never be satiated or tamed.”
Snuggling deeper into the bed of a worthy enemy, she closed her eyes and sighed. It was easy to feel content in the bed of a man she would’ve happily impaled just days before; yet feeling no love, only disgust, for the man she would have willingly committed her life to.
Maybe this was just rebound. Maybe Santiago would be her transitional object bridging the space between who she was and who she could be.
Her body relaxed even more, not even concerned about the half a dozen things she could do in this moment.
Doing nothing is also a choice; sometimes the best choice,she remembered her junior year college therapist telling her. Back when she believed her superpower was doing all the things and doing them better and more effectively than anybody.
But there’s always work to do,she’d said to her therapist.
And you don’t have to be the one to do it, the older woman had said with finality.
Maybe that’s why Derrick cheated.
Maybe she was too much, did too much.
But why would Lahn sleep with him? Why had her parents stood with Lahn over her? Why had they not said anything, knowing?—
Stop! Because unless you are willing to pick up the phone and call them, all you’re doing is asking questions that you won’t get actual answers to.
Hugging Santiago’s pillow to her, she breathed deep and exhaled, then did it again and again, until she woke up. The orange-red glow of the setting sun had transitioned to complete darkness, and Santiago still wasn’t home. Checking her phone, she resisted the urge to check on him and ask if everything was okay; that wasn’t a level of intimacy they had.
She walked through the house to the back porch and settled in the rocking chair. Despite the trauma from this morning, the natural sounds around her, the shadowed water with its advancing and retreating waves, she wasn’t afraid, not even when she looked toward her house.
Stars crowded the velvety night reminding her that the universe was infinite, beyond the reach of the sun and the earth. She told the universe she was strong enough to expand and grow beyond the betrayal of Derrick and her family. Hell, she was already doing it, she thought as she stood, preparing to go inside and scavenge food other than the cakes she’d made.
When her phone vibrated, she reached for it preparing to attack Santi for making her starve; but it wasn’t Santi. Derrick’s name and face were displayed on her screen.
The bottom didn’t drop out of her stomach, but she didn’t answer.
Of course he would call right after she told the universe she was strong enough to grow beyond the betrayal. And shewasstrong enough. She was also strong enough to hold onto her peace now that she’d chosen it. Tomorrow would be a perfectly fine time to begin peeling the scabs of dead skin from her heart. Tonight, she’d continue to rest and do nothing.
“Sheriff!”
“Stillwater stand down,” Roan shouted.
Garland Porter dug his fingers into Santiago’s forearm, deeper than skin, gouging his flesh. Santiago tightened his hold, elbow constricting around Garland’s airways. Stealing the air from the evil motherfucker’s lungs and soul.
Let him choke.
Like a rabid animal.
Garland thrashed his three-hundred-pound body around wildly trying to loosen Santiago’s hold, instead Santiago rotated his shoulder insuring no air would pass through to Garland’s lungs. At least not while he was conscious.
“Don’t kill him please!”
The plea might as well have come from the future it sounded so far away. Santiago held on until the other man’s dead weight strained the muscles in his arms and shoulders.
“It’s done League, he’s neutralized. You can let him go.”
Opening his arms wide and stepping back, Santiago let Garland fall to the ground like the sack of shit he was.
“Cuff him,” he ordered Jessie, who rolled the larger man onto his stomach using his foot.
