Quietly, I pull out my phone and order a car, asking it to meet us at the nearest park gate. Then I reach for his hand, slowly, gently, and he lets me take it without hesitation.
We walk in silence, side by side, toward the exit. The air is cool, the night quiet around us, and though nothing is certain, his fingers remain laced with mine.
And for now, that’s enough.
SEBASTIAN
Remi’s words caught me completely off guard, and now my thoughts are everywhere, pulling me in a thousand directions.
I’m torn apart by doubt. How could I do this to Maddie?
Leave her behind… and then steal the one person who’s actually helped her through it?
When she told me about the breakup the other day, she was devastated. And once again, I’m the reason. Just thinking about it makes my stomach turn.
The guilt settles over me like an avalanche, crushing, cold.
And yet, even with all that shame and confusion, the feeling of Remi’s fingers laced through mine is enough to remind me how badly I want him close.
And somehow, though I still can’t quite believe it, he wants the same.
I’ve fantasised about Remi from the moment I met him, but never, not even in my most unrealistic daydreams, did I think he might feel the same way. And now that he does? I’m paralysed.
Starting something between us would be reckless. A mess. A catastrophe waiting to happen.
We ride home in silence, sitting side by side in the backseat of the Uber. There’s nothing to say, the air between us is so charged it’s almost crackling. I stare out the window, pretending to focus on the blur of streetlights.
I have no idea how we’re going to survive the night under the same roof.
Thank God I’ve got a train to Stratford first thing tomorrow.
I booked the train late last night, after relentless pressure from my parents. I’ve put this visit off for too long. They’re eager to hear about the concert, and even more eager to push me on my future plans. I know I can’t stall them any longer.
This might be my chance.
My chance to finally come out to them.
And maybe… some time away will help. Give both me and Remi space to clear our heads. To shake off whatever spell we’ve fallen under.
Because wehavelost control. And it’s dangerous, not just for us, but for everyone around us. Especially Maddie.
I can’t lose her.
Not again.
CHAPTER 16
REMI
The ride home was torture.
Feeling Sebastian’s body so close, breathing in that soft vanilla scent while his curls brushed against my neck, it took everything I had not to touch him. Not to hold him. Not to kiss him.
I know what we’re risking. Ido. But what I feel for him is consuming. It burns through me like wildfire. It’s more than desire, it’s a pull so deep, so powerful, it terrifies me.
I’ve never felt anything like this before. Not for anyone.
I used to think this kind of thing only existed in books or films, never in real life. Certainly not for someone like me. Someone who clings to logic, who finds comfort in structure, in knowing the rules and following them. But fate, it seems, had other plans.
