What if their controlling nature pushes Sebastian to keep hiding who he really is?
What if they make him believe that what we have, this fragile, beautiful thing, is something shameful?
And Maddie… God. Would she really go so far as to stir up drama just to hurt him? It seems unthinkable, but heartbreak twists people. Warps them. And shewillbe hurt. That much is inevitable.
But I know one thing with absolute certainty: I’m not letting him go. Not now. Not after everything we’ve shared. Not after what he’s shown me, of himself, of us.
As the train disappears into the horizon, I turn and begin the walk home. The ache in my chest lingers, but I force myself to focus on the present. On the day ahead.
I’ll hit the pool, then the gym. I’ve got time, and I could use the endorphins. Maybe even brunch with Francis, it’s been too long since we properly caught up. And if I’m honest, it’s time I talked to him. Really talked.
There’s too much at stake to keep pretending nothing’s changed.
I pull out my phone to text him, but a notification from Maddie flashes across the screen. I hesitate, already bracing for impact.
And, yep, I was right. A voice message. Calm on the surface, carefully composed, like she’s trying not to sound too upset. She wants to talk soon. “Clarify where we stand.” “Work things through.”
A groan escapes me as I stride toward the Tube.
I hate the idea of hurting her. I really do.
But the truth is… I don’t think I ever truly loved Maddie.
Not the way I should have. Not the way she deserved.
I can’t bring myself to tell Sebastian that yet, not out loud, but what I feel for him? It’s something else entirely.
It’s this overwhelming sense of being seen, of wanting to protect him instinctively. It’s desire that borders on unbearable.
And beneath all that, it’s tenderness. Deep. Crushing. All-consuming.
And I don’t want to live without it.
Yes, I care about Maddie. I always will. But we’re young. We weren’t planning forever. We weren’t talking about marriage or kids. We were… safe. Comfortable.
And now I know, safety and comfort aren’t enough.
She’ll be devastated when she finds out the truth. Maybe even furious. But she’s smart. Eventually, she’ll understand that being with someone who didn’t fully love her, whocouldn’t, was never going to make her happy.
If Sebastian and I had met under different circumstances, no one would bat an eye. Breakups happen. Feelings change. People move on.
Okay, this? A supposedly straight man falling for his girlfriend’s ex?
Yeah, it’s a bit unconventional. I’ll give you that. But that doesn’t make what I feel for him any less real. And it doesn’t make my determination any less fierce.
I’m not going to avoid the conversation with Maddie. That wouldn’t be fair. She deserves clarity. She deserves to hear the truth from me.
Not just the fact that we’re over, she already knows that much.
What she doesn’t know iswhy.
She deserves to hear the truth.
That I’ve fallen for someone else. For Sebastian.
It’s going to hurt. I know that. But lying to her, letting her believe it was just confusion, or distance, or timing, would hurt more in the long run. She’s strong. She’ll be angry. Maybe heartbroken.
But she’s also too perceptive not to have sensed that someone else might be taking up space in my heart.
