“Someone who can give you a family and a nice, happy life that doesn’t get complicated by— uh— medical conditions.”
“So if I meet this great guy and he suddenly gets cancer, I should dump him? If my future hubby finds out I don’t make babies, he should leave me?”
Jesse looked at her hard, eyes suddenly wide.
Sophie didn’t see it. Didn’t see the pinpoints of red in the center of her irises. She didn’t notice the sudden firelight glow under her fingertips.
“No, I don’t think that,” he said cautiously. “If you knew more about me—”
“So tell me more about you!”
“I’m an idiot who doesn’t know how to woo a beautiful woman? I want to make sure I never break your heart when you find out I’m not the marrying kind. I know that sounds awful, some guy saying that after a couple of weeks, but you’d be surprised. That can be a big dealbreaker.”
Sophie nodded but said nothing. Her eyes settled back to their normal deep brown depths. “It’s not for me. At least right now. D-don’t you think people should know each other a while before they decide they’re not the ‘marrying kind’? Or you just don’t believe in theinstitutionof marriage?”
Jesse raked a hand through his hair. “I never let a girl get close enough to figure that out because of— yeah. I’m pretty well convinced it wouldn’t be an easy life.”
“She doesn’t get a say?”
“Gah! I was trying to be noble.”
“It came off more like ‘opinionated, patronizing asshole’.”
“Ow, girl!” Jesse grasped his chest, her words landing a blow.
“You started it. Look, if it’s the unknown weirdness in our chromosomes that makes us look like the spawn of Dracula that puts you off the dating scene, I get it.”
Jesse twitched. “That’s a big part of it.”
“Whatever it is, I have it, too. I’m not saying we should pair up like animals on Noah’s Ark,” she laughed ruefully, “and maybe we’renotMr. and Mrs. Right. I just hate having you ‘choose’ based on something you can’t help.”
“Well, I sure as hell can’t change it, that’s for sure.” He tentatively reached for her hand.
Sophie took it, feeling oddly unsettled. Is this what dating was supposed to be like?
“Sorry.”
“It’s okay.”
“No, it’s not okay,” Jesse protested, “but is at least a little bit better because I was trying to make sure I was doing the right thing— even though I was doing the wrong thing?”
“Sounds like the story of my life,” Sophie snicked. “But yes, it makes it a little bit better.” She looked at him as they walked along. They were still heading further into the quiet town, which looked like something out of an old painting, the essential small-town America where most of the shops were still little family stores and most chains had not managed to (or wanted to) muscle in. They were all lit up in the November night, loopy neon side-by-side with peeling painted signs.
“Buy you an ice cream?”
She shrugged, her appetite absent after the rocky conversation.
“Buy you a burger?”
“I’m not hungry.”
“Oh, God, I’ve really screwed everything—”
“I’ll be hungry later. I need to work up an appetite. Oh! Not like—” Sophie groaned. “You made me, Queen of Awkwardness, feel more awkward.” A horrifying thought struck her. “Am I a bad kisser?”
“God, no! NO!” Jesse looked at her and bit his lip. “That’s why I... You’re really good, let’s just say that. If you haven’t dated much before, you have natural talent. I was worried I was going to lose control, which would be wildly— impolite?”
Her ego purred slowly to life, spurred on both by his compliment and the sheepish look he gave her. Hot guy with a responsible, sweet streak? Her appetite was coming back, but she wasn’t really in the mood forfood. Her skin tightened again, electricity jolting to her nipples and between her thighs as she remembered the sensations of him against her. She distracted herself by smoothing her hair and checking out her reflection in the shop window they were passing. “Oh, and to be clear, I don’t think kissing is too out of control. Do—” She stopped, squinting. Jesse had been right beside her, but he wasn’t beside her in the glass. There was something there, a smudgy outline, but not him. She whirled as she ran a thumb over her blurry eyes.
