“Why are you asking me about that, Jahlani?”
She chases after her as she opens an overhead cabinet, rifling through it.
“Mom,” she says, closing the door, forcing her to look at her. “I’m not a kid anymore. Tell me,” she says, in a gentle tone,hoping, praying, wishingto get through to her.
“I don’t walk to talk about this,” her mom says brusquely, and all the anticipation fizzles in Jahlani’s chest as she brushes past her. After a moment, Jahlani moves back to her cutting board, chopping in silence. She wonders if she’s cursed to never fix things with her parents.
At work the next day, Jahlani feels more lethargic than usual during class and office hours and decides that it’s her cycle that’s making her feel this way.
Only a few students show up, so she decides to cut the lecture short, choosing to upload everything online, telling everyone to enjoy their break as they exit.
And it isn’t until later that night, when her phone vibrates with a message, that she feels that familiar smite of energy that she’s been missing the past few days.
Roman
You’re welcome to join us if you want.
Roman
No pressure.
And it isn’t until the next morning that she realizes just how badly she needs it.
CHAPTER 26
FIGHT GIRLS OVER BOYS
JAHLANI
Jahlani isn’t sure what to expect as she pulls into the tree-lined cobblestone driveway within the cul-de-sac (of course). She didn’t anticipate going and yet she finds herself at his doorstep. Well, his mother’s doorstep. The dashboard reads half past six as she puts the car in park before stepping out to admire the house.
Its brick walls, with accents of cream-colored trim, glow slightly from the golden light of late afternoon. A wreath of dried leaves and red berries is hung proudly on the front door, a seasonal touch that blends with the muted autumn colors of the trees lining the street. In the yard, a few pumpkins sit on the front steps. It’s nice. Really nice. Everything she imagined it would be, and the thought upsets her more than it should. She should leave. Turn back before anyone notices her.
“You must be Jahlani. Come in, come in. It’sfreezingout there.”
A woman who she can only assume is his mother stands at the door, flapping her arm, a polka-dot apron wrapped around her. Despite their eyes being different colors, she sees traces of him in her. She ushers her into the entryway and Jahlani does her very best not to gawk at the mid-century modernfinishes and listen as she talks, insisting that Jahlani“drop the formalities”and call her“Gwen.”She takes the tray of food Jahlani had pilfered from her family and red wine she’d found on a shelf that seemed appetizing and tells her to joineveryonein the living room.
Jahlani’s stomach flips at this, becausewho is everyone?She’s not good in intimate settings with people she doesn’t know. She doesn’t even knowwhy she fucking came. Panic starts to bubble inside her and she stands awkwardly in the hallway, deliberating on faking a stomach bug when Lucy swings around the corner.
She lets out a loud shriek when her eyes land on her. Jahlani falls to her knees to catch her, smiling.
“Hi, baby girl. I missed you,” she says, pressing her cheek against hers.
“Lulu, stop,” his voice calls and her heart thunders against her sternum.
Her eyes meet his over the top of Lucy’s head, and as gracefully as she can while holding her, she rises to her feet, not missing the way her knees pop.
“Jahlani,” he says, slowly walking to them until they are toe to toe. Jahlani sways Lucy in her arms as she toys with the necklace at the column of her throat.
“Hi,” Jahlani says, feeling awkward.
He smiles down at her, sliding his hands into his pockets. “I’m glad you came. I didn’t think you would.”
She nods. “Yeah. I’m not really sure how I ended up here.”
He grins. “I think I have an idea.”
“Yeah?”
