“Every decision in my life has been against my wishes, Roxanne,” I said instead. “What doyouknow of doing as you are told?” I snapped.
Her lips turned into a thin line as we continued on the small path towards Faris. “I’m sorry.” Her voice turned dull.
My head flew in her direction: surely I misheard.
“I was not fair to you then, and I am not now.” Roxanne continued, her eyes burning into the invisible point ahead. “I wouldn’t ask if it wasn’t important.”
Roxanne needn't voice her question, I knew exactly what she wished to ask. “I know nothing of value.”
Unsatisfied with my answer, Roxanne burned her gaze into my flesh. If I didn’t know any better I would think she wished to set me on fire herself.
A long while passed before she cleared her throat, addressing me once again. “I was never fond of the Royal family,” she offered, earning a judgmental glare from me. “But I know what it's like to lose your loved ones,” she added quickly. “I’m sorry you’ve lost your family.”
If it wasn’t for the snowdrifts on our path we would already be in Faris, and this conversation would be over. I couldn’t help but despise winter’s sabotage. “As I said, I know nothing of value.”
She shook her head, glancing at me before continuing, “Your silence won’t help anyone—”she sighed. “Including yourself.”
“What is that supposed to mean?” My hands tightened around the reins. The gloves I put on this evening covered every blackened burn I inflicted upon myself.
“Never mind.” Roxanne simply said, making the last turn towards Faris.
Faris was awfully quiet. The faint candlelight flickered behind the windows, fighting to stay alive. As though an old, evil spirit swept through the village, it left nothing but shadows to take thejoy’s place. Despite the road being filled with people, Faris felt abandoned.
“Where to now?” Roxanne asked in a hushed voice.
“I need to return something.” I looked around for the mysterious shop. Surely returning the item wasn’t the only reason I’d rushed into this trip, though I felt embarrassed admitting I hoped some cryptic old woman would tell me my future.
“Return what?” Roxanne asked with a dose of annoyance in her tone.
I sighed, preparing for Roxanne’s mockery. “There was an old woman that gave me a necklace right before the attack.” I showed Roxanne the amulet. “She told me some kind of a prophecy...”
“My dear Moon...” Roxanne rolled her eyes, her fingers feeling the stone. “You are wasting our time.”
“Perhaps... perhaps not.” I snatched the stone back into my satchel.
“All right.” Roxanne shook her head, looking at me as though I went mad. “Lead the way.”
We walked up and down the street twice before I gave up. “I swear her shop was here.” I pointed at the empty windows. I yanked on the door a few times before admitting defeat. “It’s locked.”
“Well, that was fun.” Roxanne snickered. “Let’s go, I still need to get Francis a present.”
“A present?" My brows furrowed.
“It’s his birthday tomorrow.” Roxanne walked across the street without waiting for me to follow. “Maybe you can exchange your cursed necklace for a present for him,” she scoffed.
The shop Roxanne had led us into held a largebookssign on the window; I followed after her.
How could I not know it was Francis’ birthday? Even though my mind had wandered elsewhere the last couple of weeks, I realized I actually did not know much about him, despite the proximity we’d shared; despite him being the first man to not hurt me the way they usually had.
It mattered not,I wanted to tell myself.It was just that—affection, nothing else. I didn’t owe him, nor did he owe me.
Yet something flickered in my heart with refusal.
I walked down the countless rows of bookshelves, filled with different texts—most of them older than myself by hundreds of years—as I followed after Roxanne. She walked down the rows with confidence, as if she owned this place.
“Where are your music books?” she asked the man behind the table in the depths of the shop. He wore a woolen blanket on his shoulders.
“Fifth row, second shelf from the top,” he said, eyes stuck to the page of the book in his hands.
