“No.”
“So, then what is it?”
“Being trapped. There’s no way out,” he admits.
I do my best to reassure him. “We’ll be fine.”
His hand comes up, his palm moving against my neck as his thumb strokes my skin.
“Are you really scared or is this just another party trick to fool me?”
His hand moves down to grasp mine as he brings my wrist to his mouth, feathering his lips over my skin before he places it on his chest. His fingers move back to my neck, rubbing softly before he reaches my jawline. He looks like he’s deep in thought, studying me to keep from thinking about the fact that he’s trapped. If he is acting, he’s doing a damn good job at it.
“Talk to me,” I whisper.
There’re a few minutes of quietness as he caresses my shoulder before he speaks barely above a whisper. “My mom would have manic episodes. She didn’t want us to see her spiraling, so she’d lock us in the bathroom until it was over.Sometimes it would be hours, other times it would last for days. It never bothered Micah. But it made me hate being confined.”
“You’re safe,” I reassure. “We’ll be out of here soon.”
His eyes meet mine, and I hear the pain in his voice as he says, “I never understood why she didn’t lock herself in the bathroom instead.”
I don’t get her logic either, but she had to think she was doing what was best for her kids even if it was cruel, right? “She thought she was protecting you.”
When he doesn’t respond, I ask, “Where was your father?”
“I don’t know. He was never around when it happened.”
Luca shifts, his mouth resting against my forehead as he sighs. I almost think he’s just trying to keep me from seeing him.
Eventually, he eases a bit. And I’m thankful his body is less rigid as we lie together. His hand settles on mine, his thumb stroking my wrist. And that’s how we remain. I stay awake for a while, but somewhere I doze off. How is it possible for me to feel safe when I’ve been buried alive? I don’t know. But I do.
And it’s a stark reminder of the situation we’re in together when my phone dies and we’re left in the darkness. He’s still awake because I feel him tense a bit before he reaches in his pocket, turns on the flashlight on his phone then settles it beside us. He still seems edgy, but we can get through this even if it’s really fucked-up and bizarre. I’m comforting him. He’s relying on me. I’m trusting him. How does the monster become the safe place?
I lose track of time. Drifting in and out. I don’t know how long it’s been, but it’s definitely been hours because when the cover is lifted off, the sun shines brightly overhead. A hooded figure peers over us before we climb out and spot the others digging the rest of the teams out. All are wearing shields so we can’t see their faces. This is so strange. The Decider isn’t around, so I’m guessing we’re done.
That wasn’t so horrible, but now I don’t know how to act because when I look at Luca all the fear has left his expression, replaced with his familiar arrogance. “Let’s go get something to eat.”
“Do you only think of food?” I ask, waving over my dirt-covered limbs. “I need a shower and change of clothes.”
“We all need one,” Brooke chimes in. “Let’s all go get something to eat to celebrate not dying. I’m starving now that I know I’m not going to suffocate with butthead.”
“At least you would’ve gone out with a smile on your face,” Micah teases.
“There was no smiling on my part. You snored the entire damn time.” She marches ahead, her back to us as she shouts, “I can’t believe I just wasted so many hours of my life buried with a dickhead.”
“Can’t wait to see what’s next,” Micah shouts back.
I don’t share his enthusiasm. This was a mind game. I’d rather do another physical test, because I don’t want to see deeper beneath the surface of the monster. I want to keep my head on straight, because letting him in would be so effortless. I can feel it already when he watches me. It’d be so easy for him to claw his way inside my head.
“I’m going to skip. I’ll see you at school tomorrow,” I tell Brooke. But that’s the reminder I needed. It’s my first day back to school since Luca got me suspended. I don’t even want to know what the week ahead holds.
But now I know his weaknesses. Could I really do it to torment him given the chance? But it’d be cruel knowing where the fear stems from. Although, I doubt he’d hesitate to use anything against me. So, isn’t it only fair if I use his weakness against him? I just hope he doesn’t make me desperate enough to truly consider it.
36
IVY
As soon as I steer into the parking lot of Belgrave Academy, Brooke is there as we walk into the building.
