You ruined her. Our beautiful daughter and you ruined her. She loved you and you didn’t deserve it.
Caleb’s heart never failed to race whenever he recalled those words that Charlotte’s parents had hurled at him in the corridor of the hospital when he’d attempted to visit, armed with flowers and an apology, the apology he should have offered her hours earlier, the apology that could have prevented the horrible, tragic mess that had unfolded. Only he hadn’t been able to get anywhere near Charlotte to tell her how sorry he was or how awful he felt. Faced with her family’s anger and his own suffocating sense of responsibility, he’d fled, but he’d never been able to erase the image of their devastated faces, ravaged by rage and pain…so much pain for their beloved daughter and her lost future—the future that, before him, had been so bright and full of opportunity.
Charlotte had been in Melbourne for a prestigious summer internship when they’d met. Unacquainted with the city or its social elite, she’d had no knowledge of his reputation for cycling through women, and he hadn’t taken the time to tell her, because he didn’t explain himself to anyone. He was a Morgenthau and he did whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted, with whomever he wanted. It had never crossed his mind that she would fall in love with him because love was the last thing on his agenda. Caleb had no intention of feeling that, not for her, not for anyone, not after the emotional carnage of his childhood. When Charlotte had finally realised that, she’d been devastated.
She had raged at him. Sobbed and shouted and eventually stormed from the club, and in her tearful, broken-hearted state had rammed her car straight into a wall, shattering her body the way Caleb had shattered her heart.
It wasn’t until late the next day that Caleb learned what had happened, but once he did, he’d been racked with guilt. Who could doubt that it was his fault when it was his cruelty that had caused the accident? Had Charlotte not been in such an anguished state, she would never have lost control of the vehicle, wouldn’t have gotten in the car at all. And he’d seen how distressed she was. Why hadn’t he gone after her, stopped her? The heavy pounding of guilt had consumed him, and the angry reaction of her parents had confirmed the fault he bore.
And Caleb had known then, with a certainty as clear as water, that he couldn’t allow anyone remotely close to him again. Because they would only end up hurting too, and he couldn’t bear to inflict that magnitude of pain of another unsuspecting, innocent heart.
And it would happen again. He knew that. Because Charlotte wasn’t the first person to be devastated by him. Years earlier, Caleb had destroyed his father when he’d driven away his mother, leaving Adlai Morgenthau a desolate, grief-stricken shell of himself. But after Charlotte, he was determined there would be no others.
He’d stuck to that resolve ever since, careful in ways he’d never been before about the type of women he spent his nights with, strict about limiting their involvement to a single encounter, a period of time too brief for any feelings, foranything real, to develop. The only misstep he’d ever made was with Serena…a misstep that still sent chills down his spine because with her inexperience and emotionality, there were so many ways he could have hurt her.
And now that she was carrying his child, there were many more.
Despite his knee-jerk reaction to return to the capital, instinct was once again urging him that the best thing he could do for Serena and for the child was to leave them alone. Generously provide, of course, but from afar, where they would be spared the harm that he would eventually cause and he could spare himself the burden of having to live with disappointing them.
But how could he just turn away from his child, his own flesh and blood, the way he turned away from everyone else?
Especially when he knew what it was to grow up with only one parent. He knew the persistent ache of abandonment, the questions that filled that yawning empty space—questions destined never to be answered. He knew it was a void that could be painted over and ignored, but still, somehow, remained. Could he really condemn his son or daughter to that fate?
There were other considerations charging through his mind too. Practical ones. This child would be the sole heir to the Morgenthau name and empire. Whilst he had been unwilling to bring an innocent child into the world just to satisfy his father’s wish to safeguard the future, now there was a child, so it was a different consideration altogether. It wasn’t about creating a life. That had already happened; now it had to be about protecting them as best he could, ensuring they received all the privilege and security their blood entitled them to. He was the only one with the power to guarantee that. And he had to. There was no certainty of what kind of father he would be, so he had to give his child every protection possible.
From deep within his chest his heart kicked, his stomach twisting as he approached an uneasy decision. Instinct might still be screaming at him the same old message, that the best thing he could do was stay far away from both Serena and the baby, but he could feel the tug of other instincts now too, paternal ones, and they would countenance nothing of the sort.
CHAPTER FIVE
Shock pinned Serenato the spot as she pulled open the front door and found herself staring into a set of smoky grey eyes. ‘Caleb,’ she breathed, her heart quickening as he filled the doorway. In another of his bespoke suits, this one a perfect match for the shade of his eyes, with a crisp white shirt beneath, he was a devastating sight. ‘What are you doing here?’
‘I got the test results back a short while ago,’ he answered, his gaze heavy. ‘The DNA is a match. You’re carrying my child.’
One hand clung to the door for support because her knees had turned to water, but Serena managed to pull herself up taller and meet his eyes fearlessly, even as flickers of apprehension licked at the sides of her stomach. Wasn’t he supposed to be on his way to the South of France? ‘You came here to tell me something I already know?’
‘No. I’m here to discuss our next steps. Preferably not on the doorstep.’ He scowled, brushing past her, and Serena didn’t even try to stop him, stumbling as she was over his use of the wordour—as though this was a situation they were in together. Which, yes, biologically they were. But in every other way, they absolutely weren’t.
‘What exactly do you meanournext steps?’ Serena asked urgently, trailing him into the living space and scanning his face for some clue that would help her ward off her rapidly descending sense of alarm—but he was as inscrutable as ever. ‘Because I told you yesterday that I’m perfectly happy to raise this child alone…’ she reminded him, striving to keep her voice steady even though she felt as if she was suddenly hovering over a minefield and, with any step, there would be an explosion.
‘And I’m telling you today that whatever you thought yesterday is not acceptable to me.’ His eyes glowed down at her in a way that made her far too aware of the unfettered leaping of her heart and pulse. ‘There is no world in which any child of mine will grow up without my name, or without me being in their life. So, you and I are going to get married.’
The word detonated in Serena’s ears and it was a moment before the disorientation cleared enough for her to form words. ‘Married?’ she repeated, hoping he would tell her that she had misheard him, but that hope sank as he made a single, controlled gesture of his dark head. She shook her head, backing away from him and from the treacherous frissons that were firing through her at the thought. ‘I don’t…no. You and I are not going to get married, Caleb. That’s insane.’
‘Actually, it’s highly pragmatic,’ he countered emotionlessly. ‘You’re pregnant with my child—it’s the logical next step. Theonlynext step.’
‘No. No, it’s not. Because this is the twenty-first century. A pregnancy no longer mandates a ring.’
In some situations, perhaps, but definitely not theirs. They didn’t know the first thing about one another.That’s not entirely true though, is it?a voice in her head asked, stirring recollections of the night in Singapore, spine-tingling memories of how they had connected so quickly, so easily. Except they hadn’t, she argued back. She onlythoughtthey had connected, wanting to believe it was more than it had been and that was a folly she had no excuse for. She should have learned from her experience with Lucas, because she’d done the same thing with him. Believing that they shared a special connection and that he would always be there for her. She didn’t want to be that same stupid girl, making the same stupid mistakes, as she tried—hopelessly—to recreate the life and family she’d loved and lost. She wouldn’t be!
Because that life that she’d known was gone—and trying to bring it back would only cause more heartbreak, which wasn’t a risk she was willing to take.
‘The baby can have your name without us being married, if that’s so important to you. And you can be involved too. I’m sure we can figure something out,’ she said, trying to keep hold of the control over her life that she’d only just regained. But she didn’t quite manage to hide the edge of scepticism from her rush of words, because she wasn’t sure she trusted that Caleb’s commitment to being involved was quite as robust as he made out. Not when a day ago, hell, probably even an hour ago, he hadn’t even been willing to accept his responsibility in the pregnancy. Not when he had stated clearly and with certainty that he didn’t want any commitment in his life, and a child was the greatest commitment of all. A lifelong relationship. Lucas hadn’t wanted that. So why would he?
‘Serena…’ Her name emerged from his full lips as part reasoning and part censure. ‘Be reasonable.’
Her mouth almost hit the floor. How could he say that toherwhen he was the one suggesting something as absurd as marriage? ‘You don’t even want to be a father, Caleb. You don’t want to get married.’
‘True, on both counts,’ he agreed calmly, moving in place and taking over even more of the damnably small living space with his dark, sex-edged, oozing masculinity. There wasn’t anywhere that Serena could look and not feel him in her gaze, nowhere to stand where she could be unaffected by the power that vibrated off him. ‘But things have changed. Now I am going to be a father and that necessitates other changes and compromises. Especially if my child is to inherit all that is rightfully theirs.’ Serena must have looked as nonplussed as she felt, because he sighed. ‘The child you’re carrying is the sole heir to my billion-dollar company, and I will not have them denied any of that because they were born illegitimate.’
