Possessiveness he had never known swamped him, fisting his insides. Without an outlet, it made him as angry as a bull.
Growing up, he’d watched his father dally and flirt and conduct scandalous affairs with one woman after the other, neglecting their mother, neglecting his children, neglecting the hotel chain his grandfather had handed him on a platter.
Making their family a target for tabloid press and fortune-hunting women. Not that he had any doubts about some of the women’s claims about their father.
Self-preservation then had been the only armor he had had left.
He hadn’t let anyone close—not Santo, not his sister, Chiara, and definitely not their mother, who had always been close to breaking. Hadn’t let anyone see how hurt and isolated he felt even surrounded by all of them.
Worse, as soon as he’d reached eighteen, he had to become their protector. Including their father, to curtail his behavior, to save him from his own excesses. Their mother, from completely shattering. Because no one else was going to. He had worked hundred-hour weeks with his grandfather’s help, guiding the company back into profits, building it bigger and better in the last few years with new branding and acquisitions.
Power, he had realized, was the only way to control his father, the only way to exist outside of weaknesses, one’s own or others’.
He had tailored his life to never want anything from anyone, whether it be kindness or help or even affection. The women he’d dated had known that and had called him a ruthless, heartless monster. But he hadn’t felt anything more.
And yet now, this woman and their child seemed to have razed all his armor to dust. Making him feel all sorts of emotions that he didn’t know how to process, or how to exist with.
“Our son,” Mimi said clearly, her gaze holding his, conveying something he couldn’t put into words.
Renzo wondered if they would develop their own language now that they shared this magnificent tiny life. Like his grandparents did.
“Please tell me more about him,” she said, tugging fretfully at the IV tube.
Renzo leaned forward, letting some of his weight drop onto her legs. The small intimacy immediately filled her cheeks with a burst of color. “He has a full head of jet-black hair and the DiCarlo nose.”
Her lips turned down at the corners. “He looks nothing like me?”
“He has your ferocity and your strength,bella. They told me premature babies like him struggle with their sucking reflex, and he does too. But when they get him to clamp on the bottle, he’s fierce at drinking it up. They said it’s a great thing that he has such a good appetite.”
Fresh tears rolled down her cheeks, and she swiped at them with the back of her hand. “More, please.”
He chuckled and took her hand in his, the naked hunger in her eyes calling to something in him.
He wanted her to look at him with such bare desire, wanted her to depend on him for everything. There was something extremely arousing, extremely motivating about winning the regard and respect of a strong woman like her. A woman whose strength of character shone like a diamond’s facet.
Merda, but only he could turn winning his wife over into a challenge for himself. But there it was, a sparkling new goal. One that set his entire being on fire.
“What else, Renzo?” she demanded, tugging at his fingers.
She had long fingers with chewed-up nails and chipped nail polish. The strangeness of her hand in his gave Renzo whiplash for a second. They had been through a life-altering event together, but she was still pretty much a stranger who didn’t believe in his commitment.
The uncertainty of it prickled against his skin, demanding action. Demanding he arrange his future,their future, to his satisfaction. He never doubted his decisions, but everything they had gone through in the past few days had only hardened his resolve that Mimi and their son belonged with him. Permanently. His little family would operate on mutual respect and fidelity and their love for their precious son.
No, it was just a case of figuring out what she wanted and giving it to her.
He patted her hand and let go. The very vivid visual of this strong, beautiful woman surrendering everything to him was enough to keep him going.
“Renzo? What’s wrong?”
“I’m wondering if I should tell you a little truth. It doesn’t paint me in a good light.”
“Are you having second thoughts about being a father?” Alarm danced in her eyes, but she rallied fast enough. As if she were used to dealing with disappointments from others. The very thought stoked his ire. “Doesn’t matter. A child’s birth is such a big event in one’s life that it’s normal to doubt yourself. I’m okay if you want to annul the whole thing…”
“Merda, cara!You really think very little of me, don’t you?”
The vehemence of his curse made her blanch, but she didn’t back away from him. “Commitments like these are hard for certain people. I don’t want to trap you.”
“Noted,” he said, half growling the word at her.
