“Can you please confirm that you don’t wish to have a lawyer present?”
Fuck.“Am I under arrest?”
“Should you be?” Holt questions me while Officer Nelson shakes her head beside him.
“No. You’re not. We’re just making sure we have all the information now that the circumstances have changed.”
Circumstances have changed.That makes it sound so much less permanent than it is.He fucking died.
“At this stage, this is just routine,” she adds.
“Unless you have more information to tell us.”
What?My eyes bounce between them as my head aches. Are they fucking good cop, bad copping me?
“Please state for the record—”
“I don’t wish to have a lawyer present.” I repeat their words back and my heart clenches.Did I just make the biggest mistake of my life?
“Thank you. Now, as we said, Mr. McKenna was pronounced dead yesterday after three months on life support. You’re here to fill us in on everything you remember from that night. Even the details you think are irrelevant. We’ll also be speaking to the other parties involved as well as hotel security who were rostered on that night.”
I nod, unsure what to say, and Officer Nelson smiles. “Take your time.”
“I don’t need to take my time. I’ve been thinking about this nonstop for months. The details haunt me. But I can’t think of anything else that I haven’t already said.”
“Then just repeat what you told the police back in August.”
“Okay.” Releasing a slow breath, I recall everything that happened that night—from our preseason game, to seeing Reed and Hayley outside the hotel, and passing Landon on my way to the bar. “He was acting strange. Talking to himself. He didn’t even notice I was there. But at the time, I didn’t think anything of it. I barely knew him. Maybe he was going over the game. Maybe it was something he always did. We all have our postgame rituals. When I heard Hayley scream, Landon was the furthest from my mind. But I ran. I knew something was wrong and I ran. I reached Reed and Hayley, just as Reed was pushing her out of harm’s way, toward me. And that’s when I saw him stab Reed somewhere in the chest. At least, I thought it was his chest at the time.”
“Sorry, by him, you mean…”
“Landon. Mr. McKenna. He stabbed Reed once and pulled back to go again. That’s when I tackled him.”
The next few seconds are the ones I’m questioning, wondering if my mind’s playing tricks on me. Not that I tell them that. I tell the officers that Landon stabbed me, and he must have because I have the scar to prove it, but I also tell them I feared for my life when I slammed his head into the pavement.
YetIwas pinninghimdown. I was bigger than him, stronger than him. Is it possible that I fell on the knife and my anger caused me to do more? How the fuck will I ever know that?
“Anything else?” Holt asks, his expression suspicious.
“No. Well, yes. When he stopped moving, I heard Hayley crying and realized that Reed was unconscious. I ran over to help her. She was kind of hysterical.”
“But you didn’t think to help Landon?”
“Honestly, I didn’t even look at his face. I assumed he stopped moving because he’d given up the fight. Believe it or not, an asshole that had just stabbed my friend wasn’t high on my priority list.”
“Your friend?”
“Yes.” The word comes out shaky because it’s not exactly the truth, but he’s a teammate so close enough.
“Would you say you were friends because you were teammates, or was it more than that?”
“Yes, because weareteammates.” Reed may not be playing right now, but he’s still very much a part of our team. He won’t leave.
“How would you say your relationship was with Mr. McKenna then? Since he was also a teammate.”
“He was a rookie.”
“And so were you not too long ago.”
