I chuckle. “I’m not. I promise.”
After Bryn’s bath, I got her to bed, and she fell right to sleep. I’m guessing she wasn’t the only one tired after last night. I feel bad that she was dragged out of bed just because of my dumb decision.
After showering myself, I opened upNew Moon, the second book in the Twilight series, to see if it would help me take my mind off of Kai and how we won’t be seeing each other tonight. My mind kept wandering to other things, and I had to keep rereading the same page over and over. Now I’ve been lying here, staring at the ceiling and just thinking.
Maybe I can ask my mom if she’ll let me see Kai at our house when he gets off work. An hour or two shouldn’t hurt. I know she said I’m grounded, but how can she think it’s fair to keep me from my boyfriend? It’s not like we can do much at the house with her watching.
I sigh at all the thoughts I have, knowing my mom will never go for any of them. It’s a little past nine, and my mom still isn’t home. She definitely went out with friends.
I had to pull out my old-fashioned alarm clock that reads the time in bold red numbers to wake me up for school since I don’t have my phone anymore. The beeping that comes from the stupid alarm makes it sound like a huge evacuation is happening. Every time it goes off, it jolts me awake and makes my heart rate speed up. I hate it. I miss the calm tone from my phone.
The sound of the garage door opening catches my attention. Mom is home. I reach over and shut my lamp off, turn away from the door, and pretend I’m sleeping.
The sound of her steps increase the closer she gets to my room. Small creaks come from my door, letting me know my mom is opening it. I don’t bother closing my eyes since I’m turned away from her.
She says nothing. She’s probably checking on me to make sure I’m home. The small creaks sound again as she shuts the door, and I shut my eyes, hoping sleep will come soon.
October 2009
“You’re watching this again?” My mom sits on the opposite side of the couch.
I’m watching16 and Pregnantagain. The show my mom thinks is so bad.
“Yeah.” It’s Saturday night, making it almost a week since I’ve hung out with Kai. We see each other in school for a little bit, but not as long as we would like.
“Why do you like this show so much?”
“I think it’s interesting to follow their lives and see what happens.”
“I’m worried it will give you ideas.”
Not this again.
She needs to drop whateverideasshe thinks I’m getting from the show. The last thing I want is to take care of a baby. “It won’t.” I’ve spent the whole day feeling bored. I can’t go out anywhere since I’m grounded. Reading is impossible because my mind won’t focus. Instead, I’ve been watching movies and shows all day. Now I’m catching up on16 and Pregnant.
“We missed you today. I wish you would have come with us,” my mom says, changing the subject. She knows I getirritated when she tells me these shows are going to get me pregnant.
“I wanted to be alone.” She and Brynlee went to a craft store and took a class together today. I didn’t care to ask what they made. The craft store holds classes for kids and their parents. Each week, they make something different. I’ve gone a few times, but the older I get, the more I don’t want to sit with all the kids.
“I’m going to head to bed. Don’t stay up too late.” She is eyeing me for a response.
I nod and watch as she heads upstairs.
The bold rednumbers on my clock read 12:00 a.m. This is when I used to sneak out. I feel a sense of agony knowing I can’t. I’m sure Paige went out with Owen. They’ve been texting a lot.
My mind is racing about Kai.What’s he doing? Is he partying?Most likely. He lives at a college party house. No one is going to stop partying just because I can’t come out.
Girls are probably surrounding him. No one better hit on him. What if he finds someone else who’s more mature than me? Ugh. Even though I trust him, I have to shake the thought out of my head.
I feel like such an immature baby.Blakely got her phone taken away, and now she can’t sneak out.
Or can I?
I circle my room, debating if I should try again. I know my mom is on high alert. But for some reason she hasn’t kept herroom door open like I thought she would if she was on such high alert. Maybe she’s not.
Let’s test the waters.
If I get caught, I’ll just say I needed some fresh air from being cooped up inside all day. All I’m going to do is sit out in the backyard. No one is here. That should be a good excuse.
