1
Aspen
“Mom, I can’t make it to Christmas this year. I have other plans.” I spoke softly, trying not to provoke an argument.
“Other plans than your family? What plans?” Mom’s voice grew higher and louder over the phone as she vented her surprise.
“I’ve booked a winter retreat. I need time away and this is the perfect place to relax.”
“You can relax any time. But not on Christmas.”
“Mom, do you hear yourself? I get two weeks off work and it happens at this time of the year.”
“Do you hear yourself, son? You’re rejecting your loving family at Christmas. That’s not acceptable.”
I took a deep breath, using all of my will power to keep my voice in a low, non-defensive tone. “Mom, I’ll see you the weekend after New Year’s. I promise. I’ll take you and Dad out for dinner.”
“But what about your brothers and sisters? They won’t get to see you. All of them are coming for Christmas dinner and presents.”
That was much of what I wanted to avoid this year. All my six siblings were married with kids. I was the only single one left and I never heard the end of it. I was only twenty-eight, but they, along with our parents, all thought I should be settled down with a family by now. We were reindeer shifters, which meant close-knit and rigid in beliefs about family and having children. As an omega, it was seen as my duty to procreate.
My parents had seven kids. As of October, I had fourteen nieces and nephews. I didn’t see that our family was shirking their duty in contributing to the population. What I did see was that Christmas at my parents’ place was always a madhouse. Plus, this year, I was expecting a heat right around December twenty-fifth. It was unfortunate timing by my body.
I loved my sibs. I loved their kids. But I needed a breather. For me that meant no Christmas.
“Mom, my plans are final. I’m not coming.”
“What are you hiding from me? Are you all right?”
“I’m fine. But if you must know, I’m expecting a heat right around the holidays.”
“We have that loft in the barn. You could be very comfortable there. And I’d bring you hot meals. You’ll be fine.”
“No, Mom. I don’t want to stay in the barn. And besides, if I’m sequestered there, no one will be able to see me anyway.”
“Your heat could be late. Or not come at all. The house is full, but your sisters are only coming for one day. Your brothers and their wives will have the guest rooms, and their kids are all going to share the bonus room out back. We’ve set it all up with crafts and toys and their own Christmas tree. The bunkbeds are all set for them. They’ll barely be underfoot.”
Mom’s Christmas parties were always elaborate. And, I had to admit, fun. She was trying her best to make me feel guilty. As if me not going this year would ruin her life. There was nothing else I could say or do to change that for her. But my mind was made up. I got my stubborn streak from her.
“Mom, it’s all set. Gifts have already been mailed out to all of you. I’ll see you and Dad after the new year.”
“Aspen, you can still cancel your retreat. If you can’t get your money back, your father and I will reimburse you.”
It wasn’t a shock to hear she was not above bribery. Mom had her ways, and she usually got what she wanted.
“It isn’t about the money, Mom. I need this. For once in my life, I want to be alone for the holidays.”
“Are you depressed? Because I can recommend a good shrink.”
“No, Mom. I’m fine. I just want to rest. I want these two weeks. This retreat is at the top of my Christmas list. It took a lot of planning and a waiting list before I finally got in. I’m going. Tell everyone Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. Thanks for understanding.”
Before she could respond, I clicked “end call.” I deliberately did not tell her where I was going. It would be just like my family to show up unannounced even though the place I’d booked was a six-hour drive from my house, and eight from theirs.
I took a deep breath and glanced about my bedroom until my gaze fell on my half-packed suitcase. My heart leaped up. This was it. I was committed now. Mom would be mad for a short while, then she’d get over it.
I couldn’t wait to leave.
My destination: Winter Wonderland Wilderness Lodge.
