“Right, because there are no other restaurants on the block,” I responded dryly.
Tai shot me another glare. “Why did I come over here again?”
I shrugged. “Let’s be honest. I’m not anyone’s idea of preferred company.”
His brows drew together, and I almost shrank back into the couch. “Excuse me, Mr. Sad Sack. Who gave you permission to talk like shit about yourself?”
“Luckily, I don’t need permission,” I said, lifting my beer in salute. “Perks of being single.” I realized my mistake the second Tai’s eyes lit up.
“So, what you’re saying is you want me to set you up on another blind date?” he asked, his tone switching from ranty to sugary sweet at the drop of a dime.
I paused midswig, almost spluttering it out all across my couch. The idea of going on a date made my stomach sour. Was Cay out there dating people? Fuck, seeing all his ex-girlfriends at the party last week had been bad enough, but the idea of him out there dating, hooking up with other women had bile rising in my throat. We never had a talk, though, just launched into this experimenting headfirst, chasing what felt good without saying a damn word.
“Come on, the first one wasn’t that terrifying, was it?” Tai wheedled, his previous rant completely dropped in pursuit of his newer target—tormenting me.
“Did you miss what an utter failure it was? Neither Cay nor I ended up with the women you matched us with,” I said, making the mistake of glancing Tai’s way again.
His gaze was fixed on me, that knowing look that unsettled me, like he was coaxing the secret I was barely keeping to the surface. “I wouldn’t call it a failure,” he said, his tone softening.
I swallowed hard, tearing my gaze away to glare at my hands. “Yeah, well, consider me off the marketfor blind dates.”
“I figured.”
Tai’s switch to seriousness had me sweating, and I gripped my beer bottle a little tighter. I should tell him. Out of anyone, he wouldn’t judge. This would be a way to rip the Band-Aid off and confess I was bisexual. Fuck, most of my friend group was queer, so it wasn’t like anyone would bat an eye. Except that clutch around my throat squeezed a little harder.
Like altering their perception of me in some way might cause them to drop me.
And if Cay wasn’t mine, was that even worth it?
“Beckett Marie,” Tai said.
“My middle name’s Ryan,” I muttered.
“Beckett Marie,” Tai continued, completely ignoring me. “I don’t know who the fuck gave you the impression that you’re difficult to care about, but I’m here to tell you that you’re not.” He cast me a wry glance. “You’re also not nearly as subtle as you think you are. This is the one thing on earth I will not push about, but fuck you if you think any of us are going to treat you differently if circumstances change.”
My eyes began to sting, and I wrinkled my nose to try to get them to stop. Fuck, fuck, fuck. Tai’s words slammed into me like a punch to the sternum. Damn that considerate asshole.
I sucked in a sharp breath. I might not be ready yet, but I sure as hell wasn’t going to forget this. The givensupport without even needing to ask was rare—I knew as much—and I couldn’t be more grateful for having such a pushy, loud, and fucking kind friend.
“Thanks, Tai,” I muttered, trying to pretend I wasn’t sitting right next to him, dealing with a bucket full of emotions. “Why are we focusing on me, though, when we could be talking about your shitty sushi chef?”
When I glanced up at him, his eyes were soft, and his lips tilted in a smirk. “Well, now that you’ve asked so kindly, I wanted to mention this wasn’t the first time he’s made a nasty comment about my shoes.”
I relaxed on the couch with the spotlight off me, even though my mind reeled. The truth was, sooner rather than later, Cay and I needed to figure out this thing going on between us. I might’ve suggested light and easy when we started, mostly because it had been uncharted territory. But I had never been the type for light and easy. Either I fell hard, or I didn’t bother.
And the feelings that had emerged toward Cay were the type that needed addressing.
“What shoes were these?” I asked Tai, letting him continue on his rant. “Because if they were the rainbow glitter Crocs, I’m afraid I’m in agreement yet again.”
“Excuse me, Mr. Desk Job,” Tai sniped back. “Heaven forbid someone who works on their feet all day might want to be comfortable once in a while.”
I snorted and took another sip from my beer, settling in for the long haul.
Cay and I were speeding toward a crossroads, and deep down, I knew it.
Getting dumped by my last girlfriend had sent me backsliding, but if Cay wasn’t in this for real? If he only wanted something casual and decided to walk away?
I didn’t know how I’d find myself in the wreckage.
