Lycan had been left blissfully alone that day, tucked away in the nest he had made on his bed of all the pillows he could find and the extra quilts and blankets.
But now, as the heat progressed, being left alone wasn’t so wonderful. Dim memories of omega-play were in his mind, but more as something he knew, not something he experienced. His body wanted that, though. Soft touches. He shivered.
“You didn’t have to come back, Van,” Lycan said. “I can get through it.”
“You need to make sure you don’t dehydrate, Ly. Every Enforcer in this house is on high alert to protect you right now, so someone had to put eyes on you and give a report.”
“Protect me?” Lycan asked, confused. That was not his understanding of Alphas and omegas in heat.
Van smiled a knowing smile. “There are reasons for that, one being they want you to be okay, Lycan, you are a big part of all of us. They worry about you. And the house is worried about you, the entire temperature has dropped ten degrees.”
Lycan nodded, he had scented the same concern from several members of the pack as it drifted through the fog of his desire, and it was nice to be cared about. He loved the feeling. It had barely registered that he was able to pick up on those things better, things like concern that would not have been discernible before the coven. Maybe his wolf was coming back, but his mind was too distracted by the heat to be clear.
“Now, I’m going to go, since I can report that you are in fact alive and hydrated and doing ok. Are you okay?
“I’m sorry—”
“Stop, sweetie. Before I found Puck, I got the worst heats. I had to be on suppressors just to keep the symptoms at bay, not to keep the heat from coming. I know how it can be. Plus, omegas stick together.” Van’s smile widened. He would call Trav and see if he was up for some omega-play. Something told him that once Trav scented Lycan, he would feel his own heat coming on just like Van was. He hoped the three of them would be heat-mates, but he didn’t want to get too excited just yet. Heat-mates happened naturally.
He hadn’t had a heat-mate since he was younger and the thought of having two now sent a thrill down his spine. Trav had played with him some back then, and maybe he would be up for renewing that with Lycan in the picture, too.
“Okay,” Lycan nodded. “I think this is my first. Maybe. Or, I don’t remember the others, but nothing sharp pulls on my mind when I try to think about them.”
Van gave an indulgent smile. “Do you really think it’s your first? That’s kind of exciting, hon.” Van squeezed his hand gently.
“Might as well be?”
“One more thing,” Van paused when there was a light knock on the door, and Van opened it and quickly retrieved something. “Here you go,” Van said, but Lycan was focused on the shirt in Van’s hand.
“Alpha’s shirt,” Van explained. “Add it to your nest, the scent can help.”
Lycan nodded and reached for it immediately, and Van’s knowing smile inched up even more. Whatever was going on between Seath and Lycan would work itself out, but he was glad that if this was Lycan’s first heat, maybe it could be eased with something as simple as scent.
“See you in the morning, Ly,” Van said as he sashayed out the door.
As soon as Lycan heard the click of the door, he moved as fast as he could to lock it, and climbed into his nest, smothering his face in the shirt.
There was nothing like the smell of Seath. Sandalwood, sun, and vanilla. It flooded his senses and both relaxed the wolf inside and made him impossibly harder and more needy. He stroked himself with the shirt, wanting Seath’s scent on his cock, knowing he could come on the garment and wash it later, no one would have to know.
He would stuff it up his hole, if he could. In response to that thought, he somehow got even slicker.
That morning Trav had explained he left “everything Lycan would need” in the bag by the nest, but when Lycan pulled out the supplies, the dildo had a knot at the base he didn’t understand. He had never seen a dildo like that before, but was too embarrassed to ask Trav when he had returned that night.
Now, smelling Seath’s Alpha musk on the shirt, he felt his slick run down his thighs in an alarming amount, and felt his hole quiver at the thought of that large knot stuck right inside of him.
Lycan moaned. Without the dildo, he had taken care of himself that day, fingers and hands doing the job well enough. He was glad to know he still wanted sex, still wanted to be filled, and could still enjoy it. He had no memories of being abused in that way when he was captured, but there had been threats. Now, with the coven, he had a fear of something locked down in his memories that would be revealed.
Maybe not, though. Everything he could remember suggested he had been a commodity, something to be sold or traded for his body and his heat. Maybe he had been lucky and the sale hadn’t happened yet. Had that been why his heat had been suppressed?
Well, desire wasn’t a concern anymore, but it was taking over, making other thoughts difficult as every part of him wanted to go find Seath and present himself to him until Seath eased the need inside him. And that was scary. The desire to offer himself up to an Alpha, and such a strong one, in that way.
He felt silly about his crush on the sexy Pack Legate. Of course the broken, discarded omega would be enamored with his rescuer. The strength of his crush was embarrassing. Seath would probably laugh if Lycan even blushed in his direction. It was known through the pack Seath was betrothed to an omega prince — his fated mate and a human—and never took male omegas to bed. The threshold had brought those conversations to his ear, too.
Lycan was completely unsure what Seath would think if he knew of his crush, but completely sure he would never let his secret be known. The crush was meaningless, but the fact he could crush on someone that way gave him hope that someday the crush would be on someone less borne out of fantasy than the hot-as-hell Legate. Someone who could reciprocate. Someone more on his level. For now, though, Lycan saw Seath as a safe place to park his newly emerging attraction. A place for him to enjoy Seath’s looks and his touches, like when Seath lifted his chin to make Lycan look him in the eye. Or stroked his collarbone during the coven. A completely impossible and harmless crush that would never amount to anything because neither he, or Seath, would ever want it to.
He had healed a lot. And one thing he knew was that if he ever took a man into his body it would be on equal terms. In the best scenario he could fantasize they, his partner and he, would both be completely sober of hormones or coercion, and the heat would come after the clear mutual desire they both had, amplifying the sex for both of them. And it sure wouldn’t be a future Pack Alpha, and all that would entail. A crush was one thing. Distanced and fantastical. Safe to wonder about. The desire he had right now didn’t seem safe at all and was much, much too real.
He had the odd toy lubed up before he could think about it too much, his hands quick to the task while his mind raced. The big shirt covered him, allowing Lycan to both rub his face in it and stroke it over his cock. He liked the reminder of Seath’s imposing size. It didn’t scare him, but turned him on instead. Lycan was open and wet, his body begging to be filled, and he made an obscene moan as the toy slid in. Soundproofing, he reminded himself, when his face flamed with the heat and the knowledge of how loud he was being.
