“I am thinking about it,” I snap. “And you are insane if you think. . .”
“I didn’t say I think anything!” Caleb barks like we’re in boot camp and I’m some grunt who is out of line during PT. He steps back, snapping his mouth closed and holding up a hand in a placating gesture. “I’m sorry. That was out of line. My job is to protect you, and that means looking at all the angles. What if you are putting yourself in danger?”
“I’m not.”
“You think you know Baylor Mann, but I don’t. I’m just telling you to look at the possibility.”
I say nothing, arms crossed.
“Just hear me out. He’s the connection. The award that was stolen washissong. The picture was made withhiswords, Cas. The online threats referencehislyrics. You were harmed on a day whenhewas on the set. The pictures from the set show up on the site that loves to feature him. All connected back to Baylor.”
“Of course, they do! Weareconnected!”
“I’ve seen letters from fans, and some of those letters suggest Baylor got some of his lyrics from other people and then didn’t attribute them on the songs. Do you know about that?”
“That’s absurd, Caleb. Plagiarism? Remember, I wrote many of those songs with him. At least in the beginning.”
“What about now? Has he ever even mentioned—”
“Hell, does Baylor even know?” I shoot back. “Does he even see those letters or are you talking about things you are pulling from the studio or stuff that is sent to me?”
I see Caleb’s jaw tick.
“Caleb, I get that this is a big deal and there is a real threat out there. But that threat is not Baylor. He’s not trying to hurt me. He’s not the kind of guy who would go around stealing lyrics from someone else.”
“He’s in love with you.”
I stop pacing, turning to look at the man whose job it is to keep me safe. The idea of Bee being in love with me the way I am in love with him isn’t one I am ready to believe in just yet.
“So, he wants to hurt me?”
“Or scare you? Or have you need him? Your first place to go was here. Don’t be fooled by this whole album project, Cas. You were headed to Bear Valley well before that. What do you know about his life for the past decade, Cas? Your life is out there on full display — his isn’t.”
“That’s not entirely true.”
Caleb just looks at me, unwilling to even concede the point. “If he’s been pining after you all this time, don’t you think it’s possible—”
“Is that what you are trying to tell me, Caleb?” I ask, anger all over my voice. “That he’s in love with me, and that means he’s also probably the guy who is stalking me?”
“If the guy who is sending you threats and changing out pills on the set is actually right in front of our faces, I’ll never forgive myself.” Caleb looks at me, eyes full of sympathy and fear and something I can’t name. “I’m saying be careful before you are too far into something you can’t get out of it.”
Caleb’s words sit with me. Of course, they do, I trust him, and I have trusted him for years. I’m not the naive kid who set out to high school after being homeschooled on the commune of the community we lived in. I made it through a year of college and figuring out a lot about the world by trial and error before I met Baylor. I’m not the naive young adult who set forth to LA, either.
I’ve learned a lot by making mistakes in this business. I was fortunate on two fronts that made my career.
One, I learned from little mistakes before they became big ones. Like that time I decided to try whatever pill was offered at a house party in LA after I opened my first big show. Nix and Caleb got me out of there. Caleb was still working with Graham back then. But, they took care of me because of the second fortunate thing.
I’vealwaysknown who to trust. This one I blame on my hippy childhood, but I have always had a good sense for people. I have relied upon that sense when it came to trusting people, and in that way, I have been much more fortunate than performers that came before me.
I knew Nix, Vernon, and Caleb were my inner circle in terms of my career and I hand-picked each of them pretty early on.
What I told Baylor on the lift is the truth. I didn’t have to worry about many of the things other performers did, because I had a good team going into this.
That’sbeen the secret to my success.
I watch Baylor with his brothers, with Piper and Liam as we hit the slopes that afternoon, and I realize that Caleb is wrong. Not only wrong, but so absurd I can’t even contemplate the idea that Baylor would hurt anyone. The fact I am entertaining this line of thinking at all is only because Caleb is the one who brought it up.
Maybe the connection between me and Baylor is just so tangled that of course he’s part of whatever is going on with this threat. But, the idea that Baylor Mann would ever do anything to hurt me or anyone else, even misguidedly, is so crazy I can’t make it stick.
