He is supposed to be by my side.
I know I am staring at him too long, but what I want is for him to kiss me. It may have been friends with benefits, or even something more for him, but it wasn’t ever just that for me. Maybe now his lips will feel different.
My fingers reach out to ghost across his mouth. “I missed you,” I tell him, still straddling the fence on the sort of raw honesty I want to give him. He could think I missed him as a friend.
Baylor’s eyes turn soft as he gazes at me for a long moment. “Of course, I missed you, too, Cas.”
As tight as my chest is, the ache starts to crawl into my throat. Sure, he missed me. But did he miss me the way I want him to? Selfishly I wish every word he wrote in those hits for me wereaboutme. Not whatever guy he found that made him dream for the future, complete with a house to match. The ache turns to bitterness, and I don’t want that.
“So, we’re still friends?” I ask.
“We never quit being friends. Not in my mind.”
I nod. Relief that even if Baylor hasn’t been pining for me all this time like I am pining for him, at least we still have a connection, even if it isn’t the one I want.
“Come on,” he says. “Let’s see what Theo and Matt sent us.”
I climb after him, the confessions being enough for now.
In his kitchen, we find a pasta dish in the many items sent over from Matt’s cabin and by the time it is heated up, Nix and Caleb make their way over from the pool house.
It’s different now, we stand closer and he doesn’t freeze at my touches. My libido kicks into overdrive. But, one talk in Baylor’s bed won’t be enough to woo him. It’s lots of talks in bed.
Nix is in work mode, armed with her tablet. No doubt she’s feeling shut-in and needs todosomething. My phone keeps pinging as she tags new events into the shared calendar she, Caleb, and I all have.
As we sit at the table devouring the gourmet pasta, I can’t help but glower at her as yet another notification dings.
“You know how to kill a snow day vibe, Nix. I’m still pleasantly hungover.” I warn her.
“No one is ever pleasantly hungover, Cas. There may be a snow day for today and tomorrow, but then you have that launch event for Marshall Torro’s new album in LA. Since he opened for you on the last tour, you are required to be there.”
“With extra security,” Caleb adds.
“Why extra security?” Baylor asks before I can.
Caleb side-eyes Baylor, but answers. “I need to run it by Cas first.”
“Run what by me? Baylor can hear anything I do.”
Caleb nods, sharing some kind of silent conversation with Nix that I can’t read.
“There were some things said in a blog post,” Caleb starts. “Nothing big, but more pointed than the usual stuff. Close to a threat.”
I cringe. I don’t look at the worst stuff that is said on the internet. Caleb vets all of that.
“So,” he continues, “I hired out some guys at my old firm to look through the fan mail faster than I can, just in case.”
I nod. That’s not new; Caleb quit his security firm to work for me so he could be with Nix without causing any issues for the company. When I need extra security or something more than him, we use his old firm exclusively.
“And?” Baylor prompts.
“There are a few things that seem to be similar — more threats than just overly enthusiastic fans.”
I look at the concerned face Baylor is trying to hide behind his scruff.
“It’s not a big deal, Baylor,” I tell him. “I just ended a tour. They just announced this movie role. There is always an uptick in these kinds of things when I’m in the news a lot.”
“I don’t want you to stay at your house when we are back in LA,” Caleb says. “Maybe The Easton again.”
