“Do it, Bish. They will listen to you,” Jack tells him.
“Thank you, Bish,” I said. “Thank you for getting me out of there.”
“We will talk soon, Perrin. I should leave you with Jack now,” he said, and I could sense him leaving the room.
My head swam for a moment. How did Bishop know Jack? Who told Jack to be here and what the hell had happened? Shouldn’t I have had to explain something?
“You gottarest, P,” Jack said, breaking our connection long enough to offer me some water. Thirst, of course, because the goddamned ketamine.
“Cold,” I said, and suddenly there was another change of blankets. Warmth flooded through me instantly. Warm blankets were one of the best reasons to work in a hospital.
“Perrin,” I heard Bannon say my name from the other side of the bed. I knew his tremor. “I’m going to move you over, be still now,” his gentle voice rumbled, and suddenly strong arms came under me gently and moved me closer to the side of the bed. It only hurt slightly at first, then a tremor that shook to the marrow of my bones set in.
“Thanks, Chief,” Jack said, and the next thing I knew, Jack’s body was next to mine on the bed, and I shuttered violently against the warmth he now offered.
“Th, th, thanks,” I managed, the new warmth overflowing my senses as I shook through the same tremors I had been having for the past few hours. These were the worst so far, but it wouldn’t be the worst before it was over.
“Gottasweat it out, baby,” Jack said against my temple. He was curved to my right side, fingers interlaced with mine as much as the brace would allow, sitting higher in the bed than I was so I could bury my head in his neck, and had his lips pressed to my temple again. I wondered if that was because it was the only place on my face without a bruise.
“What happened, Jack? Do you know anything? How did I . . ..” I asked, when the tremors began to ease, exhausted and groggy, Jack’s heat making me drowsy. Maybe Bannon gave me something, too, I wasn’t sure. I had a line in my hand, but I couldn’t see well enough to know what was in the drip. I felt like I should remember things, beyond the pain, but those were just more fuzzy, hard to grasp, fleeting images.
“Sleep, Perrin. Right here with me, and we will tell you everything the next time you wake up,” he promised, landing soft kisses all over a face I was sure I wasn’t ready to see, yet.
When I woke next, Jack was still against me, and I was warm. Gloriously, deliciously, warm. I could tell someone just changed the blankets. I had sweated all night long, sleeping in only bits and pieces through fog and pain and intense aftershocks. Jack was as damp as I was, having held me through all of it. I was shaky, but I could see, at least, the swelling of my eye gone down enough to eliminate the double vision that had made my stomach roil and my head swim.
I couldn’t tell if Jack was asleep or not, my head was against his chest, and his arm was around my shoulders. The light through the window told me it was early, but my thirst, and if I was honest, my pain, was so great I was too incredibly uncomfortable to lie there much longer, as much as I hated to disturb him. I had asked him to go home the night before, but I didn’t want him to, and I knew he wouldn't anyway.
“You awake, P?” Jack said softly above my head, his hand running through my curls.
“Yeah,” I answered, running the tips of my fingers that came out from my brace against his stomach, my hand being under his shirt already.
He turned so he could look me in the eyes, and I knew what he was going to ask and that I wouldn’t be able to lie about it.
“How is the pain?” he said, like I knew he would, his thumb already brushing against the outside of my eyes and a wrinkle on his forehead as I wondered what he saw that made him frown so much.
“I’m okay,” I said, “thirsty.”
“Your eyes are glassy withpainPerrin. I think it‘smore thanokay,” he said, moving to get me some water, and realizing it was gone.
“Jack, just don’t worry about me, I’m going to be fine,” I tried to assure him.
Jack stared at me.
“Are you fucking serious, P?” he breathed. “You went through allthat, and you want to tell me you arefine?”
“It’s done, Jack,” I said stubbornly. “Looks worse than it is. Once I explain to Bishop . . .”Jackmight know the extent of my injuries, and I could guess Bishop or Bannon had explained what was going on to Jack by now. But he didn’t know what had gone down in that room with Holden, and if I could keep him from knowing that, then at least he would be spared part of my nightmare that was forced upon him. He could be spared knowing I did it on purpose, spared the guilt Jack would have for that. Maybe it was good to just let him dwell on the physical.
I could tell he was irritated, or something like it, but he placed a kiss on my lips and whispered, “Quit being stubborn,” before leaving the room to go get some more water for my unending thirst.
As soon as the door shut, I reached clumsily for the table that came across my bed, and pulled the tray to pop up the mirror. I gasped, surprised by the extent of the damage. I had a large gash above my left eye, stitched carefully shut. My face was misshapen, a lump of bruises blooming purple and dark under the skin. The white of my eye was completely red on the left side, and I guessed a blood vessel had burst from the blows. Mylips were busted in a couple of places, and purple spread from my chin down my neck. There was a tear in my tongue, and some other minor scrapes I wasn’t sure about.
I was still assessing my damage when the door opened, and there was Holden. With Jack. I sat up in terror, ripping out the line in my arm in the process, as I struggled to get out of the bed.
The sharp pain of the IV coming out of my arm focused me to the present. The smell of the hospital room - not the locker room. The beep of the monitor, the feel of the sheet beneath me.
It’s not real, I told myself.
I looked up, and Holden was standing in the doorway, shocked and smiling, Jack close to him. Too close. Cold panic washed over me as I fumbled to move, nothing working properly. The sharp smell of alcohol hit me and my vision blurred for a moment.
