“Round two is yours, baby,” he promised.
“How do you know that round one wasn’t exactly whatIwanted?” I asked, my nose seeking that perfect spot on his neck. “Don’t you know how good it feels to take you like that?”
Our eyes locked for a moment, and something passed between us. It was deep and intense. We hadn’t talked about feelings or titles or futures at all, but we talked about everything else. He never told me about his childhood, beforethe Manns adopted him, and I never had told him why I left Boston. Some part of me knew those were importanttalks to have, but I was so damn happy when I was with him,the conversations just never happened. I just wanted him, the sex, sure, but the companionship, the friendship, the intimacy that went beyond the physical.
“You cold, P?” he asked.
“No,” I said, kissing him again, pulling at those lips.
“We can’t be late,” he said, kissing me back.
“Won’t be,” I said, still kissing him.
“It’s fine if you don’t want to talk yet, Perrin, but I want to know what’s going on for you, when you are ready.”
I blinked at him. “I promise it isn’t anything with us,” I said, liking the “us” part, and I could tell he did too. “It’s justlivingpermanently somewhere has brought up some things I need to sort through. Not bad things, but . . ..” I sigh for a moment. “More like chickens coming home to roost, as my grandfather would say.”
“I get it, P.” Jack said and I crushed him against me.
Big, life altering change doesn’t bother me. I know that makes me an outlier in a lot of ways, but my life has been full of instances of big change and I guess for me ithas never been something to fear, although jumping first and finding a net later has also been something I’ve been prone to do.
Buttrust, welltrustis a whole other thing.
Jack
“First grandchild,” CJ said with asmirk. “That trumps all of you. Clearly the favorite,” she said, gesturing to herself.
“Something should be said for making profitable business when it is not ski season, and keeping things looking nice,” Baylor said, leaning back on his couch. “There would be no rafting, trail rides, ropes course,or tubing hill without me.”
“And no flowers or Grammy’s either,” Quinn added. “Those are super important, B.”
I laughed at Quinn’s ever-present sarcasm, but we had this argument every few months or so, arguing who should be the favorite to my moms.
“Whatever, Perrin calls them every time he runs anerrand,” Matt added, joining us on the large couches that made up Baylor’s living room. “Perrin’s the favorite now.”
“You going to be okay with that, Jacky?” Quinn asked, as all the attention shifted to me.
I rolled my eyes. “Then I’m the favorite because he’s with me,” I said.
We wereout at the farm helping to organize our proposal for a Hollywood production company interested in filming at the ranch. Baylor lived in a modern cabin Quinn had designed, but the original farm bunkhouses and farmhouse were still on the property and in close to their original state. Matt lived out here too, in a small A-frame cabin tucked into the very edge of the woods, not far from the bunkhouses.
We used the bunkhouses and farmhouse for various things around the farm, events and the like. Bear Valley was known as a western frontier town, not unlike other ski towns like Steamboat Springs, and so it helped with tourism to actually have some authentic structures to use for tourist activities. Being featured in a film was something new, and what that would look like was still anyone’s guess.
Apparently, the company wanted to send a director, a writer, a producer, and maybe a few others in a few months to look over everything in person. That took some time to sort out, part of the problem being at the beginning that they were emailing meandBaylor about everything, causing confusion between us both answering, but it didn’t take long to streamline all communications going through Baylor.
After we had looked over the proposal one last time,everyone dispersed, leaving me and Baylor to finish the details.Baylor leaned backandlooked outthelarge plate glass windows that towered to the top of the cabin, allowing a marvelous view to the rolling land of the farm estate.
“You gonna tell me about Perrin?” he finally asked.
“What’s to tell?” I responded.
“Jack . . ..” he said, quietly, like he didn’t know where to go. Baylor was sweet, quiet, and loving. If he was bringing something up, then it probably needed to be said, but that didn’t mean I wanted to hear it.
“What is it, B? Don’t you like him?” I asked. I was almost terrified to hear the answer, maybe I missed something with Perrin like I had with Bryan. Well, not missed exactly, but convinced myself of—it wasn’t like I didn’t know Bryan was trying to make itinto something it wasn’t. Baylor had been the first to call me on that shit, for sure, telling me early on to put Bryan in his place.
If I had listened, I probably could have avoided the entire scene at Maxine’s that left me embarrassed and restless for many nights afterwards. I probably could have avoided seeing the guy I had been calling a boyfriend naked and tangled up with another guy, too.
“I do like him, Jack,” Baylor said, as if it was part of the issue. “He seems good for you.”
