Baylor was managing the main dining roomfor the moment, so Matt and Quinn were both sitting with us at the empty bar, and then CJ came in and I flushed straight to my ears.My sister would definitely take up whatever Quinn and Baylor hadn’t teased me about earlier. The way she looked at me and Perrin, shoulder to shoulder, told me I was going to catch hell, as if I didn’t already know.
CJ, Matt and Quinn were on the other side of the bar, making it almost like a family table, but with the convenience that they were sitting on the side where there was wine. The bar wouldn’t open until later, so it was the perfect place for us to gather, and we met here often when Matt was working. If it was after hours, we would be in the kitchen, but since the dining room was in full swing, we were here.
“I hear you got beat, Perrin,” CJ said, with a wicked gleam in her eye.
Perrin just laughed, his leg rubbing against mine where my sister couldn’t see. He shrugged, “Jack’s fast. We can’t all be Junior Olympians on our home turf.”
As soon as the words were out of his mouth, my heart dropped. He was making a joke - of course he was, but a stillness began to run through my family at his words, so Icut it off with a laugh, hoping he didn’t notice and start asking questions. I wasn’t ready for that, not yet.
“Please, you were way too close to comfort. I had only been out of my skis for maybe - what - ten minutes?” I joked.
“Isawyou getting out of your skis, jackass,” Perrin countered, catching my eyes, and making ‘jackass’ seem like a pet name.
“Explain to me what you do, like for work,” CJ asked, attention still at Perrin, as she watched Perrin and me closely.
“Yes - yeah - I’m a nurse anesthetist. I perform anesthesia like an Anesthesiologist would, but I don’t have an M.D. - I have a doctorate, though,” he explained. “My specialty is orthopedics and sports medicine, so that is what led me here. I don’t do pain management specifically, but I can help with some options of how to put someone under for a particular procedure to minimize risk and recovery time, and I have done a lot of pediatrics, which can be tricky. Bear Valley has one of the best hospitals for that in the country. Not that I need to tell you all,” he quickly added.
I could tell he was trying to keep it simple, but it was only going to egg CJ on. But, despite her questions last night, he was still being polite. I didn’t mind right now, though. It was all stuff I wanted to hear anyway, things I wanted to know, but it was easier to let my sister ask.
“Where did you work before here?” she asked.
Perrin’s face reddened from the continued attention and he looked at me for an out.
“The faster you answer, the faster it will be over,” I advised.
“Thanks, Jack,” he said flatly, obviously not excited about being the object of interest two nights in a row.
“I worked in Boston, stateside. Then I went to Europe for a while. That’s where I was working until I came to Bear Valley,” he explained.
“Why Europe?” CJ asked. I had asked the same question last night, but Perrin had deflected the question by diverting the conversation, and I never did get an answer.
I had been watching his reactions, knowing some of them now more than others. His face and eyes darkened for a second, almost like he tucked into himself, before smiling and answering her.
“Why not?” he said with a shrug that brushed his arm against mine. “It was my own Endless Winter of sorts,” he explained. “Well, Endless Summer, but with snow. I traveled, I worked, I skied.”
I couldn’t help but think about that quote from Albert Camus that always got so twisted.In the midst of winter, I found there was, within me, an invincible summer.Although, I think sometimes it was quoted as invincible spring or a few other iterations. But it was what came after that I remembered clearly.And that makes me happy. For it says that no matter how hard the world pushes against me, within me, there’s something stronger - something better, pushing right back.
Was that accurate? I wondered. Was that whathisendless winter was about? Surely, there was more to it than just going to Europe for a few years. That didn’t seem like Perrin at all. Was he here for something better to push back? I was so caught up inthat moment in trying to figure him out that I realized I had missed whole pieces of conversation where CJ was probably pulling out all kinds of information from him.
“But, how do you even go about that?” CJ continued.
“Um? Working?” Perrin asked, with a mild look of panic in his eyes, but he banked it. While I was zoned out, I could tell CJ’s interrogation was starting to wear on him. “One job usually just led to another, it’s a pretty high-demand, low-supply job and they are doing some different things with sports medicine and anesthesia . . ..” he trailed off with a furrowed brow when CJ cut him off.
“No, I mean, just go to Europe,” she explained.
“Oh, well, I knew some people through my family . . ..”
“Your family in Dallas?”
Perrin was starting to tap his leg under the table, lightly bouncing it. I wondered if he was nervous or even knew he was doing it. I placed a hand on his thigh, and he wound my fingers through his own under the table. The smile was there, but it didn’t reach his eyes, so I assumed whatever he said was true - he didn’t seem very capable of deception - but also likely not thewholetruth of anything. I lived in this Inn, and my world dealt with dealing with people all day,everyday. I read people pretty well. Something about Perrin made clear that his family was not close. He hadn’t said much about his personal life, but the way he took to our group, and the mountain, I had an impression that while Europe sounded exotic, it had also been lonely as hell.
“Yes, I am from Dallas,” he answered,butthe Texas was nowhere in his voice.
“What do your parents do?” CJ asked next. His hand in mine became a bit tighter.
“They, uh, my parents do oil, and all that implies,” he said with a quiet smile.
“Did you just quote ‘Urban Cowboy’?” I asked.
