That kind of childhood—to need support and approval and safety and get it only in half measures—left indelible scars. Ones that Hallie had pretended had healed when, at best, they’d just scabbed over. She picked them open again every time she thought this next time would be different.
Before her mom could say anything, Hallie spoke again. She needed to get this out before she lost her nerve. “You know what, I’m not doing this.”
“What, going to the storage facility? I really need those jerseys, Hallie,” her mom argued, not realizing the cliff she was standing on with her only daughter.
Hallie shook her head, even if no one else could see it. “I’m not doing that either. I’ll be mailing you the key, and you can do whatever you want with it. But what I’m really not doing is continuing to put myself through whatever fucked-up version of a relationship we seem to have.”
She didn’t think that she’d ever heard someone audibly gasp the way her mom did into the phone. Because she never swore at her parents. Hell, she barely ever raised her voice.
But Hallie wasn’t done. She was on a roll, and it feltgoodto be so brutally honest, even if she’d regret it later. At least, she didn’t think she could regret it more than doing nothing. “You don’t see me unless it’s because you need me to do something for you. And all that I’ve ever wanted to do is make you proud. Hell, I would have just settled for being included.”
She waited, wishing that the knot in her stomach would dissolve. Because even if saying these things was the right thing to do, it was still hard.
Really hard.
“When have we ever excluded you?Youwere the one who left the holidays early. Abruptly and awkwardly, I may add. It was a very rude thing to do to Mason and Claire when they opened their home to you.”
She rolled her eyes. Truly, it was like after they’d had Mason, any empathy that they could possibly have for Hallie had been emptied out of their tanks. “You don’t even know what allergies I have. You literally birthed me. What does that say about you?”
“What does it say about you, Hallie, that you think the world should revolve around you all the time? We were running a very chaotic business. And yes, Mason was a very gifted child who required additional attention from us, so you were required to be a little more independent than most children. Is that such a bad thing? You act like we starved you or something.”
This was good. Well, maybe not good, but it was important, at least, for Hallie to hear just how far apart her and her mom’s interpretations of her childhood were.
And she knew, finally, that it wasn’t all on her. Because she did have people who loved her and didn’t treat her existence as an inconvenience. People who, even when she wasn’t at her best, still showed up for her.
“It’s clear that we aren’t going to see eye to eye on things, so I don’t have an interest in being part of a family that continually makes me feel like an afterthought,” she said. “If you decide, somewhere down the line, that you feel like you understand where I’m coming from, feel free to call me. Until then, I won’t be reaching out, and I’d ask that you do the same. Goodbye.”
“Hal—” But the words were cut off as Hallie hung up the phone.
She let out a deep breath, steadying herself against the desk for support.
What in the hell had she just done?
A few hours later, as Hallie was finishing up her shift, the exhaustion from earlier still weighed her down. She thought that having that incredibly difficult and long-overdue conversation would have made her feel lighter.
And briefly, it had.
Now, though, the reality of what she’d done was finally crashing down around her.
She’d gone no-contact with her parents, and by extension, her brother, too. Her whole family, in fact. And there was no lovable, eccentric aunt waiting in the wings either. Her parents were both only children. All her grandparents were gone.
She was alone.
She was trying to make peace with this as she pushed open the door to her apartment, hoping that Brynn would be around so that at least she could feel the comfort of another human being. That would help stave off the sense that she’d done something horribly irreparable.
“Brynn?” she called into the dimly lit living room. She didn’t have the internal fortitude to accidentally walk into an ill-advised situation with her right now. Starting to cry would probably be the ultimate mood killer.
Except that Brynn popped out of Hallie’s bedroom, of all places, and Hallie’s eyebrows lifted reflexively in surprise. And even though she was not in the best state of mind right then, it still caused a quick flare of heat to burst through her, imagingwhatever Brynn was getting up to in there. It was followed quickly by her whole body softening just at the sight of Brynn.
“You’re home,” Brynn said, and Hallie couldn’t pretend that she didn’t love the sound of that coming from her lips.
Hallie smiled, taking Brynn in. She was dressed in a pair of leggings and an oversized sweatshirt, and her hair was pulled back in this adorable stub of a blonde ponytail that Hallie loved to play with whenever they were watching TV on the sofa together.
Was comfort porn a thing?
Because right now, all Hallie wanted to do was lean into Brynn and let herself be held up.
She got her wish almost immediately as Brynn’s arms encircled her, pulling her close. They stayed like that—for how long, Hallie wasn’t sure—as Brynn rubbed soothing circles on her back.
