Once my cup is full, I give Hudson a small, soft smile.
My heart picks up speed in my chest, practically thrumming somewhere at the base of my throat, while slick sweat coats my palms.
I stare up at Hudson, those sea green eyes of his fixed on my sky blue ones. I ache to touch him, to be near him, to hear my name on his lips.
I’m grateful he’s given me the time and space I asked for, but now the thought of staying away from him for another day makes my gut twist in protest.
Although, my ego still twinges with the remnants of how abandoned I had felt. How used. How—
“For the record,” I utter, the words thick and heavy in my mouth. “I miss you too and I-I don’t want you to think I’m just purposefully leaving you hanging, I just…” I fold my fingers into a fist, the cold metal of my gold ring biting into the thick flesh of my palm. “I just need a few more days.”
Hudson nods. “There’s no rush, Gee.”
There is so much more I want to say to him, but the rest of the words seem to dry up on my tongue, disintegrating like sour sugar spun paper.
So instead, I turn on my heel, walking, like a coward, away from the man I’m pretty certain I’ve accidentally fallen in love with.
Chapter 20
Hudson
Blake: heading to the crown and swan – you coming?
Me: nah thanks
Iwatch the two ticks beside my text message turn blue and a second later my brother’s name flashes across the screen with an incoming phone call.
“What’s wrong?” he asks in greeting, concern lacing his tone.
“Nothing,” I say on instinct, cradling the phone between my ear and my shoulder while ripping open the fridge in my kitchen to see if anything takes my fancy. My appetite hasn’t been the best the past couple of days. Two weeks, in fact.
“It’s a Friday night, I’ve asked if you want to come to the pub, and you’ve said no. That means something is wrong, so tell me.”
Deny. Deny. Deny.
“There’s nothing wrong.”
My toes curls uncomfortably at the thought of making Blake worry about me. I hate it.
“Hudson.”
There’s that big brother tone of his.
“What?” I snap, pushing the fridge door closed. I can’t be bothered to cook. Maybe I’ll just have a sandwich or—
“Tell. Me. What’s wrong.”
“Just… drop it, Blake. It doesn’t matter.”
“Alright.” If this was Grey I was talking too, or even Noah, I wouldn’t be finding myself off the hook that easily. “But I’m only dropping it for tonight. Meet me tomorrow morning at the coffee shop around the corner from that gym of yours. If you’re not there by eleven, I’ll come and find you instead. Love you.”
As if threatening to come and find me like a creepy stalker is just an average occurrence, Blake hangs up on me.
Throwing my phone somewhere into the depths of my sofa cushions, I slump down, staring straight ahead at the football match playing out across my flatscreen TV without even really seeing what’s going on.
Tiredness runs heavy through my veins.
I haven’t worked out for my own sake in a week and a half.
