When I pull back he smiles and leans his forehead against mine. “Belle, I’m so sorry.”
“We can talk on the way back.” I’m not nervous anymore. It’s like the kiss took all the stress away and gave me back the contentment I’ve been missing the last couple days.
I move to the side so he can open the door then slip behind the wheel. It’s only a second later when he’s sitting in the seat beside me. “I’ve missed you, Walker.” It doesn’t explain why he hasn’t sent back a text in answer to mine, but this is better. Talking in person–to him anyway–is always better.
“I have missed you so much, Belle, but I didn’t know how much space you needed.” He pauses. “I was an asshole that night at the bar. I wanted him to know you and I are together. I wanted him to see that you’re…” He sigh. “That you’re loved by someone who worships you. I should’ve just said the words to you and not gone all psycho caveman on you.”
I smile. I don’t need the words. Don’t even need the apology since I’ve already forgiven him, but it’s nice to hear that he’s sorry. And that’s enough to get me through the ride back home.
CHAPTERNINETEEN
WALKER
I wasn’t sure whether or not we would ever be this close to each other again. Most of it is proximity, but about twenty percent is emotion. She’s holding my hand while she drives which is an immense improvement over the way she drove on the way here. On the way to the vet, she drove like she was afraid of her car or that she thought it might try to break free of the death grip she had on the steering wheel.
Now, she has her wrist dangling at the top of the wheel, and she’s sitting back in the seat, grooving to that kid Bieber and singing along to her playlist. The kid asks if it’s too late to say sorry and she looks at me as she fills in the next line.
“Missing more than my body?” I grin because sweet fuck, I hope it’s true. But I also hope she’s missing my body. I sure as fuck miss hers.
At least seventy or eighty times an hour I think about her soft, supple skin and her full, lush lips, the expressive eyes, the hands. Dear God, the fucking hands. And as much as I want her, I have to make sure that we’re on the same page with all of this. And I can’t do it while we’re riding back from the vet in her car. I need to do it while I’m holding more than just her hand.
Belle gives me a quick sideways glance then turns back to the road. We’re almost back to her place, and the kitten is lying in my lap now, purring like she’s got a little motor in there and it’s fired up and ready to power a city.
When she pulls into the driveway of her place and then around to the garage, the door lifts and but she shuts the car off. I can only assume it’s so she can take me home later. But I’m hopeful that there isn’t a need. As a matter of fact, I’m going to do whatever I have to do to make sure.
Once we’re inside, she takes the kitten and holds her while Cheddar comes in for a sniff. He takes a couple then looks up at Belle. She doesn’t speak, but she’s communicating with the cat. I’d bet my life on it. More so when she puts the kitten down beside him and he looks up, narrows his eyes and then paws the kitten, sending her rolling and he gives chase when she takes off.
We watch them together for a second, like we’re watching our kids play.
“Belle, I know that you said it’s okay, and you forgive, but I’m still sorry for the way I acted. It was a dick move, and I should’ve respected you.” There’s no excuse. “I don’t want to be away from you again.” I don’t know exactly what that means, and I can’t visualize it, but I know it’s true. I don’t want to spend any days without her. “The past few days have been miserable. There was something missing. A part of me.”
She glances up at me then turns her body toward me. “What was missing?”
I don’t know if she’s only asking to force me to say the words, and I don’t care. I’ll shout them from the rooftops. Just because I didn’t realize how I felt about her until I almost lost her and then saw her again, doesn’t mean the feelings are any less true.
“You were missing.” She pulls my head down for a kiss, and I can’t hold any of this inside any longer. “I haven’t been in a lot of relationships, so I’m probably going to screw this up. A lot. And often.” If history is indicative, anway. “But it won’t be because I don’t love you. Because I do.” I need to make sure she understand. “Love you, I mean.” And then I add, “So much.” Just so we’re clear.
She smiles again and the weight of what I’ve just said is heavy on my chest. Not because I expect her to say it back or because Ineedher to say it back. I don’t. It’s enough that she knows how I feel so long as it doesn’t send her running screaming away.
And every second that ticks away, my insecurity about her response grows.
Her voice is soft, silky and breathless when she answers. “I love you, too.”
“I’m going to make mistakes.” I repeat it again, because it’s so very true.
“Me, too.” She smiles and somehow, she’s in my arms now, hands on my chest, fingers curled into my shirt. “I want to be with you, Walker.”
“Oh, thank God.” Relief is almost as powerful as desire. And right now, I’m full of both. I want to kiss her, hold her, just absorb all the goodness that is her. But I also want to sweep her up and carry her to the bedroom, put her in the middle of the bed and look at her for a few seconds before I cover her body with mine.
“So what do we do now?” She pulls her lower lip between her teeth and smiles as it slides out to be full and puffy and lusciously red.
I am never going to get tired of looking at her or seeing the emotions change the expressions on her face. “We’ve got time to figure it out.”
She nods. “Let’s just always figure it out together, okay?” I nod and lower my head to seal it with a kiss.
EPILOGUE
BELLE
