“Don’t give me that look. I was tired. Lectures shouldn’t be put on until at least midday. Don’t they know people of our age need more sleep?”
“Get an early night?”
He scoffs and waves his hand. “Like that’s an option?”
I roll my eyes.
“Anyway, I’m here to see you.”
His words make me feel lighter and chase away the storm cloud that’s been sitting over my head since I talked to Casey yesterday.
“You look like a toddler who had all their toys taken away. What’s up?”
“Casey.”
“He’s still not talking to you?”
“The opposite. We talked. A lot.”
“That’s great.”
I look at the floor.
“That’s not great? We don’t have another lecture until three. Let’s go somewhere, and you can tell me all about it. And then I can tell you about my research.”
“The research you said you needed to do on Saturday night?”
“I think you’ll like it. But you first.”
We find space in the canteen near the science buildings. I wait while Auggie gets us drinks. He sits beside me and puts a comforting hand on my thigh.
“What happened?” he asks in a gentle voice.
Everything spills out of me. How I wasn’t as understanding as I should have been with Casey yesterday morning because it took me too long to wrap my head around the fact that he isn’t interested in sex. At all. How I can’t stop loving him, even though he’s convinced we can’t work, and honestly, I am too, even though it hurts. How Casey wants me to be with Auggie, and I do too, but that doesn’t stop me from wanting Casey. When I cry, Auggie pulls me onto his lap, holds me, and lets me press my face against his shoulder, even though my tears make his jumper damp.
As far as I can tell, Auggie listens without judging me, even though I wouldn’t blame him for doing so.
“You can tell me to fuck off now,” I whisper.
“Now you’re feeling sorry for yourself. Stop that right now. You might be smart when it comes to science, but I’m starting to doubt how smart you are when it comes to relationships.”
I sniff and laugh. “Probably not very. And I’m clueless when it comes to sex. But I know I want it. Which is why Casey’s right. We could never work together.”
“Well, that’s where I think you’re both wrong.”
I lift my head. “Huh?”
“Can I tell you about my research now?”
I nod, get off his lap, and return to my chair. All the ice in my coffee has melted, and it isn’t cold anymore, but I sip it anyway. He seems to have abandoned his coffee, which will have the opposite problem to mine.
“You got me thinking on Saturday when you told me about your dream.”
I frown. “About the three of us?”
Auggie nods.
“That’s definitely never going to happen. It was a very sexy dream. With lots of kissing and touching, and in it, Casey was very into it.”
