A bus arrives as I reach the stop, so I hop onto it and find a seat. I take my phone out, open a web browser, and type ‘Can you want two men at the same time?’ into the search bar. I discover pretty quickly that the answer is yes. As the bus trundles through the streets, I fall down a polyamory research rabbit hole.
14
EMORY
Casey’s door is open when I drag myself out of bed around mid-morning on Sunday. I saw him last night when he got home from swimming, but only briefly. He was understandably tired. The trouble is he seems incapable of sleeping in because he’s so used to getting up early.
I stick my head into his room. “Morning.”
He’s sitting at his desk, tapping his pen against a notepad. He has three different textbooks open. “Hey, Em.”
“Working on an essay?”
He drops the pen and rubs his eyes. “Yeah. Did you sleep well?”
“A bit too well. Have you had breakfast?”
“Yes. About an hour ago.”
“You look like you need a nap.”
He smiles, and my heart flutters. “Probably, but you know me—”
“Once you’re up, you’re up?”
He nods.
There’s nothing out of the ordinary about our conversation, but it feels stilted. I’m looking forward to things being back to normal between us.
“How’s the essay going?”
He stares at his books for a few seconds and then shuts each one, stacks them, and puts the notebook and pen on top. “Slowly. Can we talk?”
I forget to breathe. “Talk?”
“Yeah, you know? I say something. You say something. Maybe we hug it out at the end.”
“I’d like that.”
He moves to his bed and sits on the edge. “You’re in love with me?”
“Yes.” I take a faltering step towards him.
“Why didn’t you say something?”
I rub my arm. “Because I thought you were straight, and it was pointless. I also didn’t want to make things weird between us, which is exactly what’s happened.”
“That’s my fault. I’m sorry. I know I’ve been turned in on myself this past week. I needed to figure some things out.”
“Have you?”
“Yeah, I think so. Thanks for coming to the swimming comp yesterday.”
I fold my arms and give him a mock-stern look. “You’re changing the subject, Casey Hill.”
He laughs. “Humour me?”
“I like watching you swim.”
