We’ve only been naked once when we jacked off.
“Okay.”
We disentangle ourselves long enough to remove our underwear and settle into each other’s arms again. We kiss softly and lazily, sometimes using tongues and pecking each other’s lips. I run my fingers over his arm, side, and hip. He does the same to me, his touch light and tentative. I get more turned on by each kiss and touch. By how our chests are pressed together and how our cocks lightly brush. By the feel of his legs beneath and around mine. Sometimes I can’t tell where I end and he begins. Even our hearts beat as one. My skin tingles with desire. My heart swells with love for this beautiful, brave man. I can only imagine what thoughts are running through his head, what nightmarish memories he’s having to squash to lie here with me, sharing these intimate moments.
He rests his head against my neck and sucks in a breath. “Thank you.”
“What for?”
“Being you.”
I graze my chin over the top of his head. “It’s not hard, especially when I’m with you.”
He chuckles sadly. “You must want more than this.”
“I want whatever you’re happy and comfortable doing. Nothing more.”
Callan tilts his face up. “I think I want release. With you.” He stumbles over the words. I can feel the heat rising off his red cheeks. He buries his face against my shoulder.
“We can jack ourselves off again.”
He shakes his head. “Can we try something else?”
“Anything you want.”
“I don’t know what I want. I don’t know what would feel nice or what I’d be able to cope with.” His words run into each other.
“Hey.” I press a kiss to his temple. “It’s okay. We don’t have to do anything at all.”
“I want to. It’s just—" He gestures to his head.
“I understand.”
“Women have gone down on me before. I guess it shouldn’t be any different for you to do that. If you want to,” he adds quickly.
I chuckle. “I offered, didn’t I?”
“I know, but I might not know much about kink and stuff, but if you’re a Dom, you’re meant to be in charge. I wouldn’t have thought you’d have liked—” He squeaks as I kiss him.
“Who says I wouldn’t be in charge? I’d be making you come undone. I’d be deciding when you orgasm.”
“Huh.” He lifts his face and blinks repeatedly. “I didn’t think of it like that.”
“It might be slightly different to a woman going down on you.”
“Why?”
I smile and rub my beard against his cheek.
“Oh. God, you must think I’m so dumb.”
“All my experiences have been with men. All yours have been with women. I wouldn’t know the ins and outs of sexy times with a woman. I’m not expecting you to know the reverse.”
“Thanks for trying to make me feel better about my naivety.”
“Did it work?”
“A little.” He puffs his cheeks out. “Would you—? Could we try—?”
