“I love you, Addy.”
He chuckles against my skin. “I love you too.”
He rolls off me onto his back and grabs the lube. “Finger first?” he suggests.
I nod. He squirts lube onto my forefinger and then his. We turn to face each other, top knee raised, foot flat on the mattress, exposing ourselves.
“What now?” I ask, feeling foolish. I’ve never touched myself there before.
“Maybe rub a finger back and forth over our arseholes?” Addy says, sounding as unsure as I feel. “We don’t have to push inside yet.” There’s a nervous tremor to his voice.
I shuffle closer to him so we can kiss if and when we want to. Then I put my hand between my legs and touch myself, running my slick finger back and forth over my entrance lightly. A shiver instantly racks my body, and I let out a sound that’s halfway between a gasp and a moan.
“Nice?”
I nod as my eyes flutter shut. “Yeah. I wish…”
“What, Fitz? What do you wish?”
I want him to be the one touching me. “You should try.”
I still my finger and open my eyes in time to see him put his hand between his legs. He lets out a similar garbled sound to me. He presses his lips to mine, moaning against my lips as he keeps stroking himself. I move my finger again, back and forth, gently but gradually applying more pressure until I can feel the give of my muscles. I could push my finger inside myself, but do I want to?
I keep touching myself as I use my other hand to stroke Addy’s beard while we kiss. “This is hot,” I whisper between fervent kisses.
Addy chuckles against my lips. “You still haven’t told me what you were wishing for.”
I smile and nuzzle his nose. “That wish can wait.”
“You’re sure?”
“Yes. I’ll tell you when we’re done playing, I promise.”
“Playing?”
“Touching. Fooling around. Experimenting. Playing.” I whimper as I push my finger against my arsehole, feeling resistance. My body begs for more.
“Go at your own pace,” Addy says. “If you’re ready to do more than touch, do it.”
I kiss him desperately as I push the tip of my finger inside myself. I groan against Addy’s lips, and he sweeps his tongue inside my mouth, which helps me relax. My arse muscles hug my finger tight, but there’s no pain, just a pleasant sensation of fullness. Is Addy doing the same, or is he still stroking himself? Either way, it’s sexy that we’re doing this together.
“Do you like it?” Addy asks.
“Yes,” I breathe before searching for his lips again. “Do you?”
“It’s…odd.”
“Odd good or odd bad?”
“Odd weird.”
“Would more kissing help?”
Addy pecks my lips. “More kissing always helps.”
I smile and push my finger a little deeper. A groan rips out of my throat. “Oh, God.”
I want to try the plug mostly because this is awkward as hell, and I’d rather have both my hands free to touch and caress Addy. I don’t move. I want to wait for Addy. I want to experience this with him. Besides, it’s not a rush. Both Max and Deacon said not to rush.
