“No, it’s not,” he replies angrily. “It’s yet more proof that I’m a waste of space.”
“That’s not true.” I hate that our parents have made him feel that way with one fucking phone call. No. Not one phone call. They’ve been on his back for years.
“I know you all think I am,” Blake spits.
“Blake.” I’m not sure what to say to make him feel better, but I definitely don’t want him going out in a state. “Don’t go. Stay. Calm down, and we can talk about it.”
“I don’t want to talk! I just… I need some fresh air.”
Stubborn Blake is back. He’s made up his mind, and I won’t be able to talk him out of leaving the house.
“At least tell me where you’re going?”
“I don’t know. Around. Somewhere. I’ll be home soon. You don’t need to worry about me.”
“Iamworried. Stay.”
“I can’t. Not right now. I’ll be okay.” He opens the door. “I’m not going to do anything stupid. I’m just going to walk around and clear my head. Okay?”
It’s not okay. He can promise me that until he’s blue in the face, but I’ll still worry. I’ll worry because he’s my brother and he’s upset. Plus, I can’t help feeling like this is partly my fault. I shouldn’t have told Mum and Dad that Blake has decided not to live with Lexi and me. It was his news to tell when he was ready to.
I stand. “Blake, please,” I say, in a last-ditch attempt to get him to stay. “You’re upset. Don’t go out.”
Blake walks out, shutting the door behind him.
I fling it back open again. “Blake!” I call after him.
He breaks into a run. He knows as well as I do that I can’t follow him because Lexi is upstairs asleep. I keep calling his name, hoping he’ll listen and come back. He doesn’t. He rounds the corner and is gone.
I glance up the stairs. Lexi will be asleep unless our conversation woke her up. I take half a step out the door and then falter. I can’t go, but I can’t let Blake run off alone in the state he’s in either. My heart races as I grab my phone and speed-dial Spence. Thankfully, he answers quickly.
“Hi, sweet boy, this is a nice surprise.”
“Daddy, can you get hold of Gabe or Calvin?”
“Yes. What’s wrong?”
“Blake’s upset and has run off, and I don’t know where he’s going or what he’s going to do, and I can’t go after him because Lexi’s asleep, and I can’t leave her and—”
“Slow down,” Spence commands.
His voice forces me to stop and breathe. “Please call them and let them know Blake needs them? He might listen to them. I’m really worried, Daddy.”
“I’ll call them now. Do you want me to come over, sweet boy? It sounds like you need a hug as much as he does.”
“Yes, please, Daddy,” I whisper. “Thank you.”
“Any time. Sit tight. I’ll get in touch with Gabe and Cal. Don’t worry. Blake will be fine.”
* * *
Spence arrives half an hour later. I haven’t heard anything from Blake. Even though he told me not to worry, I am. The second I open the door, Spence wraps me in his arms.
“Are you okay, sweet boy?” he asks, kissing my cheek.
I nod and then shake my head, leaning against him. I wrap my arms around him, and we stand in the doorway for several minutes, holding each other. I soak up his comforting embrace, my thoughts gradually calming.
“I got hold of Cal and Gabe. They’ll find him,” Spence promises me as he leads me inside. “Do you want to tell me what happened?”
