“What?” he asked, eyes wide as saucers.
“Pants down and over my knee, Jordan. Let Daddy help you settle down.”
“How?” he asked, his breath starting to come fast enough that it was going to make him light-headed if he didn’t get control of himself. “By spanking my ass like I’m some kid? I’m older than you are, Andy. Fuck. This isn’t… it’s not… it’s not even sexy like this.”
“Shhhh,” I said, pulling him toward me. “I’ve got you. Let me take care of you, petal.”
“What does that even mean? You’re mad about bad sugar? Because you hate F-bombs? Because I keep forgetting your coat? Because I dropped my damn fork?”
“Threw it,” I corrected him, trying not to smile. He was definitely panicking, but God, he wanted it. I couldseeit. He wanted me to mean it, to not give up on him, and I wouldn’t. Not ever.
“Fine, whatever, I threw it. I’m sorry, okay?” he said, scrubbing his fingers through his hair. “I mean, nothing broke. That’s not something you get to spank me for. And isn’t spanking supposed to be a sex thing? Because I’m not even hard right now. This isn’t hot, Andy. Just fuck me already if you want my ass bare, okay? This is stupid. Why do you even want to do this?”
I patted my lap again.
“Dude…” Jordan said, swallowing hard.
“Daddy,” I reminded him, holding his gaze. “And I want to do it because you need it.”
And I wanted to be the one who gave him what he needed... if he’d let me. Please, let him let me, because I was either going to lose him now or become his Daddy for real, and something twisted inside my chest as he stood there staring at me.
Because I couldn’t be in charge ofthis.
I couldn’t do anything but wait for him to decide which one it would be.
13
Jordan
My heart was pounding soloud that I could barely hear my own thoughts, which was fine, because I didn’t knowwhatto fucking think.
I’d been looking forward to coming over here all damn day, but then, once my night starting spiraling into a steaming shit sandwich, I’d known—fuckingknown—that it was going to end badly. And of course it would, because shit you looked forward toalwaysdid, but Andy kept acting like he didn’t get that.
What he should have done was either kick my ass out or stuff it full of his cock, one or the other, but instead he kept pulling this Daddy shit on me. Not even regular Daddy shit, the kind you saw in porn, but this… thisotherkind.
“Fu...udge,” I whispered, reaching down to open my fly like I was on some kind of autopilot, my hands disconnected from my brain and only able to do what Daddy told me to. I pushed my pants down to my thighs, my cock filling so fast as Andy watched me do it that it would have been embarrassing if I wasn’t already in a whole different universe of humiliation for eventhinkingI was going to lay over his lap and take what he gave me like some kind of naughty little boy.
Which was why I couldn’t think about it.
Didn’t want to.
Just wanted to ignore all of the bullshit still boiling around inside me, about my mother and Paolo and having fucked up Andy’s instructions earlier and fucking up my banking and just, just…fuck.Allof it. I didn’t want to think about anything anymore, not right now, I just wanted to do what he told me to and have him mean what he’d just said.
I wanted it to bereal.
I shuffled forward and let him tug me down over his lap.
“That’s it,” Andy said, pulling me forward, positioning me how he wanted me. “I know you had to get all that out, but it’s so much easier just to be good, isn’t it, baby?”
“No,” I lied, feeling fifty shades of shaken the fuck up. That dinner he’d made me—and who the fuck did that for a booty call?—was still on the table behind him, and with him on this chair like some kind ofactualDaddy, it was even more fucking awkward then when he’d spanked me on his bed. There was no fucking support for my chest, my head hanging down until all the blood rushed into it, legs fucking flailing, and I couldn’t… couldn’t…
“Andy,” I said, shoving against his leg and arching my back as I tried to turn over, get up, quit this fuckingbullshitand get the fuck out of his addictive orbit before I fell for him even harder. “I can’t—”
“Shhhhh,” he cut in smoothly, his voice like some kind of wonder drug that paralyzed me. “Just settle, sweetheart. I’ve got you.”
His arm came around me and held me steady, and fuck if the noise in my head didn’t quiet right down even as his firm hold made my cock get harder. I wasn’t turned on, though, I was fuckingembarrassed, letting him see me at my fucking worst, not just this shit about being over his knee, but fucking unloading on him the way I had when I got here. Throwing his fucking fork like I was having some kind of actual tantrum.
Fuckingfuck. There was no way he could actually want me for anything more than a pity fuck at this point, and the worst part was that I was so far gone on the guy that I’d even take it.
