“What you said last night…” He trailed off, standing with the intention of moving closer to Jag.
“That I loved you?”
Jag’s words stilled him. “Yes.”
Jag clenched his teeth, his jaw setting into a hard line. “I don’t need you to say it back. I’m sorry if I came on too strong or said it too soon or—”
Michael strode over to him as he spoke, cutting off his last words with a fierce kiss that he didn’t want to end. When it did, he’d have to explain himself, and then he’d see that fear in Jag’s eyes again. Or worse, he might see betrayal. But their lips had to part. The kiss had to end.
“I love you too,” he whispered.
Jag’s eyelids fluttered, his lips parting and eyes widening in shock.
“Which is why I don’t want you to leave,” Michael said. “I thought that if you told me what you were running from, I could protect you from it.”
Jag shrank away from him. As Michael had anticipated, fear danced in the young man’s eyes.
“Jag—”
“No.” Jag’s voice was sharp and cold. “Youpromised, Michael. No questions.”
Michael felt like a jerk, but he knew he couldn’t back down. “Listen to me,” he said. “I don’t want to lose you. If there’s any way I can help you—”
“I told you. I don’t need protecting!” Jag was practically yelling as he edged further away from Michael. “I don’t need saving!”
“I don’t want to lose you,” Michael repeated. “I love you.”
Jag blinked fiercely, but tears spilled from his eyes anyway. “I told you I’d have to leave. You said you were okay with it.”
“Well, I’m not,” Michael snapped, regretting his abrupt tone. “How can I be? I’m in love with you.”
Jag pressed his free hand to his forehead. “Stop saying that. Stop using it like a weapon against me.”
“I’m not—” Michael started to protest, but Jag’s icy stare stopped him. That was exactly what he was doing. Regret churned in his gut, making him feel sick. “I’m sorry. I just…I want to understand…I want to help…I want you to be able to choose to stay if you want to.”
The anger seemed to slip away from Jag. His shoulders relaxed a little. His jawline softened. He dropped his hand to his side. “You can’t help.” His voice trembled out of him and was quickly followed by a quivering sob. “I wish you could. I wish I did have a choice, but you can’t, and I don’t.”
Michael dared to approach him and tentatively stroked the young man’s upper arms reassuringly. Jag didn’t pull away.
“Then help me understand why. Please.” He knew he was begging, but he didn’t care. He’d finally found someone who understood him and accepted that Edward would always be a part of his life. He couldn’t lose him.
Jag stared at him hopelessly. “I just wanted to do something nice with you,” he whispered, lifting the shopping bag a little. “I just wanted to enjoy the time we had.”
“I know.” Michael kissed his forehead. “I’m sorry. But I need to know. I thought I could respect your secrets, but I can’t.”
Jag shuddered and lowered his face. “I don’t like keeping secrets,” he whispered. “Especially not from you.”
“So don’t,” Michael said. “Nothing could be so bad that I wouldn’t understand.”
Jag shook his head fiercely. Michael couldn’t see his expression but imagined the young man squeezing his eyes shut or clenching his teeth again. Gently, he placed his fingers beneath Jag’s chin, coaxing him to lift his head. Jag’s dark eyes were glistening with tears, his pupils expanded to swallow the brown of his irises. His face had paled, and there was so much pain etched into his features that it made Michael’s heart ache. Tears sprang into his own eyes, and he regretted saying anything at all.
“Forget it,” he said softly. “I don’t need to know.” He went to take the bag, which Jag relinquished to him. “Let’s go cook.”
He took a couple of steps down the hall, expecting Jag to follow him.
“I have rules,” Jag said, his voice cracking.
Michael stopped and looked back. Jag hadn’t moved. He was still standing close to the doorway, facing into the office.
