I should’ve never gotten out of bed.
***
ONE BY ONE SHE OPENEDthe files on Reid’s screentop. At first they led to folders filled with other files and soon she found herself within a labyrinth of layers of data that went on forever. She didn’t waste time on anything that she couldn’t understand and continued moving on to the next layer or the next folder if only encrypted paperwork or codes showed up.
Every time she opened a new one, she’d glance behind her, waiting for Reid to stop her.
It’s been nearly two hours.Her anger at being left locked up in his room, in his facility, without food and completely alone grew with every passing minute. She no longer thought it was a mistake on his part.
The next folder: Reports.
Data. System codes. Programs.
She moved on. It wasn’t until she was halfway through that she stumbled uponhim.Clara shuffled on her feet and sucked in an excited breath as row upon row of images appeared in front of her. Her eyes widened as they took up the entire screen, the entire wall in its mass. The colors vibrant and many. Even in their minimized state, the quality was perfect.
She took a step back knowing she stared at hundreds of memories, possibly thousands, all from Reid’s past.
The first image emerged and took over the rest. It was a candid group shot of a bunch of men and one woman decked in battle gear. Nothing about it was clean. There were at least a dozen strangers in motion, some staring straight back at her as if she was living that moment in time. Staringdownat her.
Clara knew immediately that she was looking through Reid’s eyes. Dirt, blood, and grime covered everyone, smoke wafted up from laser-based weapons, some held in limp hands, others clutched with white-knuckled intensity. She’d never seen such haunted eyes. This was war.
The men and women before Reid had recently come back from battle. The filth and grease were evident everywhere.
Is Reid... kneeling?
From that point on, the war images worsened. It was like watching Earth die rapidly before her eyes, the emotions seized her, knowing there was absolutely nothing she could do to stop it. Corpses replaced codes. People replaced programs. The dead replaced the data.
She’d learned more about the war in just a few pictures than she had during countless hours studying it as a kid. It made her problems feel small and insignificant. If there was any innocence left in her that could be lost, it was lost then.
A horrible clarity rushed through her and she couldn’t stop the tears streaming down her cheeks, wiping the back of her hand across her face again and again.
When a military image of Reid, not from his eyes lifted before her, she stopped trying to hold back her tears.
The metal image of the dog, her protector, sat in stark contrast against a red background. Reid Canis was tagged, along with other men and metal animals. Her pulse skipped a beat and she stared at her companion, seeing Reid’s eyes for the first time, seeing the dog’s eyes the same way. The darkness of them. And the black light that they gave off.
Guilt assaulted her and she quickly walked out of the room and into the closet, through the bathroom, and back into the bedroom to pace.
Clara clenched her fists, feeling trapped, wanting to run and scream but knowing there were cement and metal walls that enclosed her from every side. Sweat beaded her forehead, between her breasts, under her arms,everywhere,and she rushed back into the bathroom and splashed cool water over her face.
She didn’t dare look at her reflection. Didn’t dare think of the child growing in her womb. But with that thought, she went back into the closet and approached the dog collar and lifted the military tags attached to it.
Reid’s name and military number were embedded on it. The unit he was in and the battleship he was on.Cyborgwas stated, along withshifter.
Mutt.
She took the collar off its stand and brought it back into the main room, staring at it, hoping all its secrets would be revealed to her. And like a good girl, waiting for her heart to stop its marathon, she sat on the hundred-blanket bed and faced the locked panel, waiting for Reid’s return. Her stomach growled but she ignored it as she absently massaged the aches from their earlier lovemaking away.
What bothered her was that she wasn’t even angry, or scared. Instead, she was sad and numb. Sad for him and the other Cyborgs, but sad for herself too. It was like a big secret had been kept from her her entire life. Clara brought the collar to her nose and breathed Reid in.
“Clara.”
His voice startled her, coming from everywhere and nowhere at once. The screen next to the panel lit up and she lowered the collar away from her face, licking her lips.
“Reid?” she squeaked out, her voice raspy to her ears.
“What did you do?”
She was caught, knew she would be at this point, and didn’t try to hide it. “I found out... about you.”
