Instead, there was nothing. Just a hollow space where the relief should’ve been, and the same dull, numbing betrayal that’s been sitting in my chest all day.
I’m chopping vegetables for the salad when the garage door finally opens. My shoulders tense, breath caught in my throat… and I exhale when it’s only Harvey who steps inside.
He stops at the threshold, eyes flicking to Milo’s back as he sits glued to the TV in the living room. Harvey walks closer and lowers his voice so Milo won’t hear.
“I talked to him.”
I don’t answer. I just keep chopping, the knife steady against the board even though my hands feel anything but steady.
Harvey sighs. “He didn’t deny it. Said he had a nightmare one night and went to the kitchen for water. Said he wanted to drink, but he’d already gotten rid of everything alcoholic… except the tequila in the freezer.”
My hand stops mid-slice. My voice comes out flat. “He hates tequila.”
Out of the corner of my eye, I see Harvey shrug. “He was desperate.”
I nod and bite my lip, then set the knife down because my fingers won’t stop trembling. “How didn’t I know…”
Harvey puts a warm, steady hand on my shoulder. “None of us did.”
I let out a small scoff. “You don’t live with him.”
The words scrape out of me, sharp with everything I’m holding in. “So… now what? He clearly can’t quit by himself.”
Harvey nods. “He can’t go to rehab either.”
“Why?” I ask, even though dread already curls in my stomach.
“With the complaint hanging over him,” Harvey says quietly, “even a hint of a drinking problem could cast doubt on him. It’d make everything worse.”
I shake my head. “I don’t see how that’s possible. Especially with that tape.”
Harvey’s mouth parts, stunned. “How do you know what’s on the tape?”
I pull my phone from my back pocket and open the video, the one I’ve watched more times than I want to admit. I hand it to him. He takes it, and I watch as a dozen different emotions flicker across his face. Confusion. Shock. Disbelief. Anger. Disgust.
He glances at me once, and I know exactly which part he’s at.
When he finally stops the video, he looks at me like he’s seeing a ghost. “You watched this.”
I nod. “Every frame. The only time she can claim force is when they disappear inside the bathroom.”
Harvey hesitates before asking, “You know he didn’t… right?”
I let him sweat for a full beat, maybe out of bitterness, maybe because I need that second to breathe. Then I answer, “I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t.”
Harvey lets out a long breath, relief softening the tension in his shoulders. “We’ll have to get him into AA. And we’ll just… keep an eye on him.”
I turn to him, eyebrows raised. “You want me to keep an eye on him?”
He shakes his head immediately. “Of course, not just you. All of us. Me, Mom, Dad. We can help.”
“No,” I say quietly. “I mean… I can’t do this.”
Harvey’s brow pulls tight. “Do what?”
“I can’t pretend everything’s fine. Not even for Milo. I can’t carry this kind of stress.” My voice wavers, but I push through it. “I can’t keep acting like our marriage is alright.”
“What are you saying?” he asks, almost afraid of the answer.
