“No, thanks,” she says, nodding for us both to sit. “I have something I need to tell you both.”
A sense of panic sets in, and when Amelia reaches for my hand, it’s clear she feels that something’s wrong too. Still, we both take the couch, sitting side by side as the caseworker takes the armchair. She takes a moment to steel herself before turning to look at us.
“The mother reached out,” she says, and I hold my breath for her next words. “She wants Wren back.”
The living room is quiet following her statement, and although this was stated in court as a possibility, there’s no stopping the rage that sets in. The one thing that keeps me from bursting is the hand gripping mine. And the fear that I might wake my child and cause her distress.
So despite the blood boiling through my veins, I force myself to sit still. “She’s not taking Wren,” I say through clenched teeth. “She thinks she can just fucking give her up and then come back whenever she feels like?” The memory of the cold, unfeeling letter she left behind pisses off me afresh. Those were not the parting words of a tired and heartbroken mother, but an inconvenienced one.
“The law allows for mothers to change their minds,” the caseworker offers sympathetically.
“Well fuck that!”
Amelia grips my arm and pulls me down before I can get up to start pacing. “So what happens to Wren?” she asks. “Does Wren’s biological mother get to show up and take her? Just like that?”
“That’s not quite how it works,” Kelly explains. “The mother is going to petition the court to terminate guardianship and regain custody. This means the judge will have to think of the best interest of the child and not just the mother’s change of heart.”
“She gave her up!” I hiss, and Amelia rubs the back of my hand companionably.
“This is good for us, right?” she asks. “Hawk adores his daughter and has done everything to reorder his life and prioritize her. The judge will see that, right?”
“I have met the mother,” Kelly says with something of a dislike in her voice. “And I would love to tell you that the court always looks into the best interest of the child, but oftentimes, the court looks at one side and sees a mother who was too overwhelmed and needed time to come to terms with motherhood. On the other, they will see a single man whobelongs to a notorious motorcycle gang. You will be judged more harshly than she will.”
Fuck this!
Amelia doesn’t stop me when I shoot to my feet this time. She seems a little pale and nervous herself when I stop pacing and turn to look at her.
“I will not let that woman take my daughter,” I say firmly.
“Then you should prepare to contest her petition. As her father, you have rights too,” Kelly says, sympathy clear in her eyes.
“Doesn’t it matter?” Amelia asks. “That Hawk has a stable job, a whole community behind him, and a fiancée?”
Kelly is quiet for a moment before she finally speaks. “I’ll be honest here, he would have better chances if he were married. Stability is the best thing for the baby, and the court will acknowledge that.”
Stability.
The word rings in my head long after Kelly Davis has left. There’s a sense of dread in the apartment, something sad and heavy that even Wren notices when she wakes up. She too seems fussy, and not even Amelia’s music calms her down.
“What happens now?” Amelia asks as I pace around the living room with my fussy child, trying to get her to quiet down though it seems she doesn’t want to. “You’re going to contest the petition, right?”
I nod, but Christ, do I even have a chance at all to win this and keep my daughter? “Maybe I should pay her to stay away.” The woman robbed me the first night; I don’t doubt she’d jump at the opportunity of getting money from this. But my stomachchurns at the thought of offering money to keep my daughter, and Amelia seems to agree.
“I don’t believe that’s a good idea,” she says before jumping to her feet. “How about we all head to the park for some fresh air? That’ll help us think clearly.”
I nod, figuring it’s the best choice for everyone, and in less than an hour, Wren is strapped to my chest and Amelia is locking the door behind us. I take her hand, a subconscious move, as we head out.
Everything was working out perfectly with Amelia and Wren. I was starting to finally experience a family I hadn’t known I needed, and it sucks that the universe would throw me these curveballs. The threat to take my daughter away…
“I can’t lose her,” I say as we step into the streets and start for the park. “I thought my family’s bloodline would end with me. That is, if my parents didn’t decide to have more children after losing custody of my brother and me.”
“Wait, you have a brother?” she asks. “How come you never talk about him? Are you estranged?”
“We were when we aged out of the system,” I say, and I realize that with Amelia and Wren so close, the memory of it doesn’t hurt as much as it used to. “We couldn’t seem to agree on anything. He fell into a bad crowd when we left foster care, and he held so much resentment for the system. I suppose I did too, but I didn’t let it drive me.”
“What happened?”
“Whatever happens to men who refuse to outgrow their rebellious phase.” Okay, maybe I still haven’t gotten over the whole incident, or the guilt of not being able to help my brother. “He was shot last year during a robbery.”
