I stared at him for a beat, recognizing the business metaphor for what it was.“Sometimes it does,” I said quietly.
Simon’s expression shifted, something like disappointment crossing his features before he masked it.“Suit yourself.But you’re better than this.”
Before I could respond, the bride and groom’s first dance was announced, effectively ending the conversation.I wasn’t sure Simon was right, but I knew one thing with certainty.I wasn’t ready to risk my heart again.Not now.Maybe not ever.
At that moment, Noah and Fallon stood and made their way to the dance floor, the jazz band’s melody swelling into a romantic ballad.As I watched them, I couldn’t help but think about the wedding I had once planned.Would I have looked at Ivy with the same besotted look that was on Noah’s face as he twirled his smiling bride around the dance floor?Would I have felt that kind of certainty about my wife and our future if she hadn’t left me just three weeks before our wedding?
Probably not.
Because happy women didn’t cheat.They didn’t walk away from a three-year relationship without a backward glance because they’d fallen in love with someone else while I’d been too wrapped up in my job on Wall Street to notice.
I forced the memories back, burying them where they belonged.Dwelling on the past did no good.It was over.Lesson learned and I’d moved on.
The first dance ended to warm applause and the floor quickly filled with other couples.Some guests mingled, family and old friends catching up while enjoying the atmosphere.Children ran around the back of the room, playing a game of tag, and a few people headed to the open bar.
I considered joining them for a stiffer drink to numb the edges, but what I really needed was a break from the wedding festivities, and hadn’t Simon essentially given me permission to do so?No matter how I felt about the concept of weddings, I didn’t want to ruin anyone’s good time.Now that dinner and the speeches were over, I could slip out quietly.Escape the romance and sentiment before it suffocated me completely.
I remembered seeing a bar about a block away from the reception, so I stepped outside while everyone else was distracted.Standing right beside the entrance with her back leaning against the brick exterior of the building was my sister, Shannon.I knew she wasn’t looking for an escape like I was.The vape pen in her hand and the smell of cotton candy in the air revealed her reason for stepping away from the party.
I stopped beside her, hands in my pockets.“You’re supposed to be inside celebrating.”
She raised an eyebrow.“I could say the same to you.Where areyougoing?”
“Sneaking away,” I admitted quietly, and rubbed a hand along the back of my neck.“Don’t mention it to anyone.”
She frowned.“It’s Noah’s wedding, Liam.”
The guilt was instant.I looked back toward the doors, hearing the muffled, joyful sounds from inside, but the thought of Ivy, of the wedding I almost had, made it impossible to return.
“He won’t even notice I’m gone,” I said, forcing a shrug.“He’s too wrapped up in wedded bliss.And I’m happy for him.”
I hated how I sounded.This wasn’t me.I wasn’t the brooding type.Normally, I was the one making jokes, keeping things light.But today…even my normally easy charm felt like a lie.
Shannon tilted her head, studying me with the same quiet intensity Mom used when she knew one of us was lying.“You know, not every wedding has to remind you of her.”
I exhaled on a groan.First Simon, and now my sister.“I’m fine.”
“Liam—”
“I mean it, Shan.”My voice came out sharper than I’d intended.“I’m happy for Noah.”
She reached out, squeezing my arm.“I know you are.But you can be happy for him and still be hurt.Those things aren’t mutually exclusive.”
“I’m not hurt,” I insisted.“It’s been three years.”
“Yeah, and you’ve dated half of Manhattan since then,” she said bluntly.“And the second any woman wants something real, you bolt.That doesn’t sound like someone who’s moved on.”
I looked away, jaw working.“I’mnothaving this conversation.”
“Of course not,” she said, wryly, then softened her tone.“I’m sorry.I’m not trying to be a bitch.I just…miss the version of you that actually believed in this stuff.The Liam who got excited about the future instead of running from it.”
Her words hit harder than I’d expected and I swallowed against the tightness in my throat.“That version of me got his heart shredded,” I said quietly.“I’m not going back to being that naïve.I’m happier this way.No attachments, no expectations, no one to disappoint when I don’t live up to their expectations.”
She sighed and took a pull from her vape pen.“Okay,” she finally said, resignation in her voice.“Go.Get out of here.But, Liam, one day you’re going to meet someone who makes you want to try again.And when that happens, don’t let Ivy steal that from you, too.She’s already taken enough.”
I nodded, just to pacify her.“I’ll keep that in mind.”
“And I won’t tell anyone you snuck out, unless Mom asks,” she added, a knowing grin curving her lips.“You know she can sniff out a lie from us like a bloodhound.”
