“I hope you can’t go anywhere without death threats. I hope they follow you everywhere you go?—”
“Shut up!” one of the guards shouts, yanking her thin body over his shoulder. Her barely there dress rises from the position, causing her ass to be on full display.
“Oh my God, she knows my name.” Lily grips my shirt in a panic. Looking at me like I know all the answers in the world when, in truth, I’m more lost than her. “How does she know who I am, Elijah?”
A sob bursts from her mouth, and I know this is all my fault.
It’s all my fault.
My head spins, tilting like a boat on waves, as the world sways beneath me. I try to grasp the scene in front of me, and the lump of panic I’m all too familiar with forms in my chest. I can’ttell who it is, but I’m pushed back into my seat. The unknown is gone, and my siblings and friends rush back into the room.
I let the rough depths of the sea take ahold of me and fall into the dark that’s all too familiar.
THIRTY-TWO
LILY
I lie awake in his bed.
My eyes are dry and burn, but I don’t dare close them.
How could I when my heart feels like it just went on a marathon and it refuses to relax? First, I asked an alcoholic if he wanted a drink. Then I started talking about kids with my childhood best friend, who I’d had a massive crush on, and we got interrupted by some random girl who knew my name and declared war on me. Lastly, Elijah fainted mid–panic attack.
What more would you like to throw at us in one night, world?
The bus is dead quiet. Trinity and Leonidas went into their room downstairs after reassuring me this had happened before and Elijah hated seeing that he had an audience when he woke up from sleep.
Not taking any chances, I brought my pillow in his bunk, and cuddled up beside him. I haven’t taken my eyes off his restful, sleeping face once. His mouth is parted slightly, hair messy with sleep, and his body is free of any tension that was gripping his muscles tightly only hours ago. If only he could find this peace outside of la-la land. Maybe that would mean escapingHollywood by disappearing off the grid, but he would never do that to his siblings.
I move a bit closer to him, only for his body heat—of course. My fingers accidentally brush his. Not moving for several seconds in case he wakes up, I look down at our hands and hook my pinkie around his, squeezing.
Seeing him online did nothing to show the internal battle he’s faced for years. If he hadn’t come back to our small town, I would have never known he was hurting this badly.
Hollywood is truly deceiving.
Resting my forehead on the side of his shoulder, I close my eyes and try to ignore all the thoughts racing through my head.
I beg my mind to turn off and let me rest, but his raspy voice breaks the silence.
“This is the best moment of my life becausetheLily Papas is cuddling me.”
My heart skip-starts, and a new wave of erratic beats pumps in my chest. I jump up onto my elbow so I’m leaning on my arm above him. He has a small, sleepy smile on his handsome face.
“Did you hope I wouldn’t wake up and realize you were cuddling me?”
“How long were you pretending to be asleep for?” I accuse him, scolding him with my eyes.
“Maybe one minute or ten … you will never know.”
I slap his chest when he snorts. “You scared me to death earlier and now again when I thought you were the talking dead.”
He winces, rolling onto his side. Only a sliver of space is separating our bodies from colliding. And the awakening thoughts of wanting to pull his lips onto mine finally make the saliva go down my throat harder. His eyes follow the movement.
“I’m sorry about earlier. The last thing I wanted was to scare you. I should have protected you from her, but my stupid brain had other plans and shut down.”
Not letting myself overthink this moment, I cup his chiseled cheek and play with the short hair at the nape of his neck. “It makes me mad that you’re apologizing for something that you should never have to feel. I have never been so scared, Elijah Drakos. I’m sorry you’re carrying the world on your shoulders, I’m sorry your happiness got taken away, and I’m sorry I painted you a villain when you were probably a prisoner.”
Elijah sucks in a breath. He remains silent when I brush my thumb over his cheekbone, and his eyes flutter closed. “There have been so many nights where I wondered what I would say if I ever got another moment with you. And now that I finally have a chance, my brain has gone completely blank.”
