Holy shit, someone, please get me an oxygen tank.
He mumbles something in his sleep and squeezes his arms around me. I try relaxing into the feel of him, but my body is as stiff as a board. Loving the feeling of being consumed by his scent, I attempt to flex my muscles slightly, but I’m also careful not to wake him up. I drop my head onto his broad shoulder behind me … and in result, his lips part on my neck. What happens next makes me want to faint and scream at the same time.
He sucks faintly on my neck, a featherlight touch. I should move away because he’s deep in sleep. But my body is planted in place, frozen in time, as if someone hit the pause button on a remote control. Goose bumps rise on every inch of my skin as my breathing comes out in pants rather than the smooth, deep breaths that his chest makes.
Leo’s mouth is soft against my skin. The more he mumbles into my skin, the more kisses he gives me without knowing. I try to understand what he whispers out with emotion in his sleep, but the only thing that I get is gibberish.
“I’m so sorry,” he whispers next more clearly, gaining my entire attention. His voice breaks. He thrashes around lightly, bringing me with him. “It’s all my fault. I ruined you.”
What?
Who did he ruin?
He thrashes again, letting out a cry as his arms squash me painfully around my stomach. Turning my head around, I shake his shoulder. He’s having a nightmare. I need to wake him up from this hell he seems to be in. His forehead is creased heavily as I practically shout his name, desperate for the torture to stop.
Leonidas’s eyes open wildly as he sucks in a shaky, deep breath. He pushes me away from his body, making me land roughly in front of him. Both of his hands go up and grip his messy hair in a panic. Putting his head between his legs, Leo lets out a distressed cry.
Sitting up on my knees, I examine him. “Leo,” I whisper.
His breaths turn rougher as he says, frustrated, “I told you not to call me that.”
Right.
“Leonidas, you’re okay. It was just a dream.”
I know how it feels to have a panic attack. It feels like your body has been taken over, controlled by an unknown force within you. Nothing and no one will ever calm it down. It’s all up to you. My heart absolutely shatters when I see him like this because this is who he truly is. A guy who hides his pain behind his frowns and sarcasm.
Leonidas lets out a laugh and glances up at me with a wild look in his eyes. “Is it really? Is it really a dream? Because it sure as hell didn’t feel like it.”
Opening and closing my mouth, I just sit still and process the words he just spit out.
I watch as he tries to catch his breath from his panic, the way sweat rolls down the side of his face. Running his hands through his hair, he lets out a shaky sigh. He gives me a weak smile once he calms down. Ruffling up his hair, he frowns once his eyes land on my neck.
“Who the hell gave you that?” he demands and stands up suddenly.
I follow his lead. Every step forward he takes, I take one back. My back hits the wall, and his chest comes right against mine as he pokes at my neck, where his lips once used to be. My breathing gets heavier.
“Who did you let touch you?” he grits out passionately, making me melt on the spot.
Even though he did this, I don’t admit that to him. I want to get him mad. I want to see him get livid at the thought of another man touching me, pleasuring me, making me feel good.
“No one,” I say and twist my head away from his.
He pulls my chin in his direction and gives me a firm look. “Whose lips were on you?”
I raise an eyebrow, teasing him. “Why? Are you going to beat him up?”
His gaze bores into mine. He licks his lips and glances down at mine. “No one can please you as much as I can. Now, tell me, who the hell gave you that?”
Looking into his dark eyes that resemble a galaxy, I get lost. He’s perfect.
My therapist taught me a method about panic attacks. If you take your mind off the panic, you’ll eventually calm yourself down. I guess he’s okay now. Anger has overcome the panic in his mind.
I let out a low laugh and smirk at him. I don’t know where this boost of confidence came from, but I’m loving it. Placing my hands on his chest, I run them down his stomach, only stopping when I feel his defined abs.
Wow, they feel better than I thought.
Placing my lips against his ear, I whisper, “No little boy can please me. Keep dreaming.”
