Placing my face in his neck, I grasp the back of his head tightly. “The last thing you need to do is apologize.” I tighten my hold when his breathing turns faster. I won’t ask him if he’s okay because I know he’s not. I just hold him in my arms to show him I’m here and I’m not going anywhere.
“Are the others okay?” I ask what I’ve been dreading.
He winces. “Elijah is okay, but Amelia tripped when she was running off the stage. She fractured her ankle.”
Shoot. Poor Amelia. At least none of them got the bullet …
“The bullet came so fucking close. We could have died.”
My body stiffens in his arms as he breaks down after the words leave his mouth.
The thought of Leonidas and the triplets almost getting shot raises my anxiety. I want to shove them in a room and lock it. The air in my lungs doesn’t seem to want to cooperate as I hold him like my life depends on it. Every time I breathe in, a sob breaks through.
I would have lost him and my best friends to a bullet, like I lost my dad …
What is my life? A bloody joke.
“You could have died,” I croak out. “I wouldn’t have had you anymore.” Tears stream down my face as I shake my head against his chest in denial. “You would have been killed, just like my dad.” My chest trembles due to my sobs.
I completely breakdown in his arms. The thought of knowing I could have lost him after all we’ve shared terrifies me.
He says nothing as he pulls me closer. I don’t know how many minutes have passed, but when he pulls away, his face glistens with tears.
“Trin.” He pauses and runs a hand down his face. “I’m so fucking scared.”
Walking away from me, he paces the room, pushing his hands in his sweaty locks as he stresses. “What if someone had died? They would have died at my concert. How the hell would I have lived with that too?” Every word that leaves his mouth gets louder. His brown eyes are wild.
“It wouldn’t have been your fault—”
He interrupts loudly, “They were at my concert. That means they trusted my team that they were safe.”
“You didn’t pull the trigger,” I grit out, not liking the way he’s beating himself up for what just happened.
“That doesn’t matter when a bullet goes through you.” Falling onto the couch, he places his head in his hands. “I was terrified, Trin. The entire time, I wanted to know if you were okay. But no one knew a damn thing! I thought you got hurt. For God’s sake, you were standing right in front of me! I looked over in your direction and didn’t find you there.” His reddened eyes find mine.
Taking slow steps toward him, I clasp his chin in my grip. “We’re fine. No one got hurt badly. That’s the only thing that matters.”
Placing his forehead on mine, he breathes out a heavy sigh. “I don’t know what I would have done if you weren’t here.”
“I could say the same.”
He rubs his eyes. “How did this even happen?”
I shrug my shoulders as my response. I constantly question why bad things happen. I always come up blank.
Life is like standing in the middle of an ocean. Either you drown from the ruthless waves or you float. But with a little help from a life jacket and a boat, you’ll be able to touch land again.
With Leonidas, everything feels a little less terrifying. He brings my body a calmness I haven’t experienced yet in my lifetime. His smile brightens my days. I love him more than jelly loves peanut butter. Cringe, I know. I just wanted to say that once.
“Think of all those people who could have been killed! How will they ever trust us again? How will I ever be able to show my face again?” Leonidas’s voice is muffled because of his hands.
No, not these thoughts …
As I open my mouth to say something, a knock sounds at the door. Leonidas’s and my bodies stiffen up.
Don’t let fear overcome you. Show Leonidas how to be strong.
Clearing my throat that feels like closing up, I call out softly, “Come in.”
