Antonia’s eyes lit up. “Lady Bora! Please join us.” She pushed aside a doll to make room for me.
I presented the flowers to Ari. “For you.”
He smiled. A faint flush crossed his cheeks. “Thank you.” He looked around, failed to find a vase, and stuck them inside the empty teapot instead.
“I don’t mean to interrupt, but I have an important question to ask you.” I fixed my gaze on Antonia. “Can you swap me back with the duchess?”
Antonia paled. She looked down and pinched one of her hands. “I don’t know how. I’m sorry,” she whispered. “I’ve been practicing with my magic tutor. I couldn’t do anything with the insects. My tutor even volunteered to let me test my gift on her, but nothing happened. I can’t feel the same emotions as when I did it the first time.”
“Didn’t your tutor also say that distance might be a factor? What if we got the two of them in the same room? Do you think that would help?” Ari asked.
Antonia slapped the table. “I can’t!” Tears welled up in the corners of her eyes.
“Hey, don’t worry about it. I didn’t mean to upset you.” Over Antonia’s head, my eyes sought out Ari. His face was grim. I couldn’t mention the urgency of the situation and the threat to my body, not in front of a child.
Antonia sniffled. “I’m sorry. Please don’t hate me.”
“Of course I don’t hate you. I’m the one who’s sorry for bringing it up.”
Ari said, “It’s not your fault. She’s been upset ever since she found out that the real duchess is back in the castle. I just finished calming her down.”
And then I had come in here and ruined it. I winced. Carefully, I sealed all my feelings about my body’s possible murder into a box for later. Ever since I was a small child, I used to set aside my feelings whenever my mom got upset and needed comfort, so I was good at that. “Shall we return to the tea party?”
We played for a bit, but Antonia’s heart didn’t seem in it. Her hands shook, and she kept glancing at the door. Eventually, her tutor came by for a history lesson, and we got booted out.
“You’ve heard?” I asked once we stepped into the hallway.
“Yes.” Ari bit his lip. “I’m going to protect you. If this all goes wrong, then we’ll run away from Arahasnor. You, me, and Antonia. I promised her that I’d take her, too, rather than leave her with the duchess again.”
“Thank you.” I held out my hand and Ari accepted it. I squeezed. After a moment, I said, “I have an important question for you. Please answer honestly. Don’t worry about sparing my feelings. Would you really still like me if I was in my original body?”
“Yes, absolutely,” Ari said. “I likeyou. Honestly, it would have been easier for me if you’d been in your original body from the beginning, instead of looking like the woman I hated for so long. I wouldhave liked you even sooner, if not for that. Now, I like you no matter which body you have.”
I stared off into the distance. That was the answer I’d wanted to hear. I could run away with Ari and Antonia if I could get my real body back.
Except would it really be that easy? As long as Antonia was the key to the duchess’s regency, she’d always be hunted. I risked causing global turmoil. There might even be a war. How many lives would be lost because of my selfishness?
It terrified me to think of staying as Duchess Hedri. Up until now, no matter what outrageous thing I’d done, I’d been able to tell myself that it was the Blood Duchess, not me. I’d never planned to take responsibility. If I went through with this, then I’d be stuck with every single insane thing I’d done for the rest of my life. My throat tightened. My heart raced. It became difficult to breathe.
“Bora?” Ari patted me on the back. “Are you all right?”
I swallowed hard. It took me two tries to speak. “What if I can’t get my real body back?”
“Then I’ll learn to love this one.” Ari took my hands. “I meant what I told you before. I’m willing to keep trying. I rushed it too much, forcing myself before I was ready. With time, I’m sure I can accept your current body.”
These were the first words to make me smile since the bad news. “I really like you. I mean it. Antonia said something that made me realize you thought that I liked Countess Donya. I used to have a crush on her, it’s true. She was the cool hero who I admired. But that was only an idle, unattainable dream. I never seriously fell for her. You’re the only one I can picture spending the rest of my life with.”
“Bora …” Ari whispered. He seemed unable to speak. He took both of my hands in his.
“I’m crazy about you. I want to stay with you forever. And I want to protect you, too. That’s why I’ve decided to accept this trial. I’ll pretend to be the Blood Duchess for the rest of my life.”
Ari paled. “You don’t have to do that. It’s too much to ask from you. We can still run away.”
“I don’t have to, but I’m offering it anyway.” I stared straight into his eyes. “Just promise me one thing. Please never forget who I really am. Please always call me Bora. I need you to see my real self, even if I have to pretend for the rest of my life.” My voice caught.
Ari pulled me into a hug. “I will. I promise. Bora, Bora, Bora,” he whispered, chanting my name over and over again, like a prayer. “I’ll keep you safe.” His hand touched my neck with his diamond ring, seeking out skin contact. “I release you from your life-oath.”
The chains briefly manifested around my heart, then dissipated. I was free. I gasped, clutching the left side of my chest.
