“Jack,” I say his name, but it sounds more like another moan. My breath is coming out in short pants as I work myself closer to the edge, and almost like Jack can read my mind, he moves his hand to press his thumb on my clit through the lace. “Oh my god.” I arch as he swirls slow circles, short-circuiting my brain as I tip over the edge, my body shattering into a hundred little pieces.
He combs his fingers through my hair, peppering little kisses along my brow. “You’re beautiful, Alondra,” Jack repeats as I try to grasp control of my sensibility again. I didn’t think it could be like this with someone. It certainly wasn’t like this with Bradley, but it’s more than a little relieving to know my body is capable of responding to another person. That the pieces of myself are capable of being whole again with the right person.
“So are you,” I say, and he laughs, smiling at me with an ease and a familiarity I’m beginning to crave. I hate how used to Jack I’m getting, especially at night knowing he’s on the other side of my door, camping out in our living room in case my crazy ex-boyfriend shows up in the middle of the night.
Stop thinking, Al.
I slide my hands from his neck down his chest, but he catches my wrists, stopping me on my path. “What are you doing?” I ask, just as Jack lifts them, pressing a kiss to my pulse in each one,and it’d be easy to get used to being treated with such care after being shown the opposite of what can happen.
“I’m okay. Let’s get you cleaned up,” he says, and I look down between us, a hoarse laugh escaping me.
“Yeah, I’m pretty sure there’s hard evidence proving you’re not okay.”Why doesn’t he want me to touch him?
“It’ll get the message soon,” he says, helping me up. “This wasn’t about both of us. It was about you needing to take back control of that part of your life, and I get it. Happy to help, but I’m okay, really,” Jack says, giving me a tight smile.
“Did I do something wrong? Were you not into this?” I ask, trying not to spiral, but it’s really hard not to.
Jack brushes a stray curl back behind my ear, his touch gentle and sure. “Al, you were perfect. I’m into this, but I don’t want you to feel like you owe me anything. I want to say yes, but I’m really okay.”
I let his words digest in my head, and as much as I’m confused, I also understand where Jack’s coming from. “And this doesn’t change anything?” I ask, needing to hear him say it again.
“Not a single thing,” Jack says, and I step away, moving toward the bathroom attached to his room. “We’re still best friends.”
I raise an eyebrow, wondering when the hell that became our label. “Since when are we besties?”
“You can deny it all you want, Al, but we’re totally besties. You should hurry before our friends start to wonder where we’ve disappeared to,” he says, chuckling softly to himself.
I roll my eyes, but he has a point. If we’re gone for too long, it will raise all sorts of questions I’m not sure I want to have the answers to.
CHAPTER 19
Alondra
It’s beena few days since Halloween, and Jack has been true to his word. Things haven’t changed between us or become weird, and I’m grateful for it. At the same time, I also haven’t been able to stop replaying it in my mind. I thought it was hard to ignore what one kiss with Jack felt like, but now that I know what hooking up with him is like, I’m tempted to know whateverythingfeels like.
No one questioned our disappearance at the party, but I guess I was a little too enthusiastic when kissing Jack’s neck, and I left a hickey behind. Jack left his mark on me too, but at least my hair was able to hide it for the rest of the night.
I’ve gotten the hang of how to blend the concealer into my skin to hide it the last few days, and it’s fading, just not as fast as I wish it would.
Now I’m just trying to figure out if I can be true to my word because every time I look at Jack, I think about kissing Jack, and then I spiral down a rabbit hole I have no business going down.
I twist my hips, turning my skates to stop quickly on the ice before taking off again, darting around Jack as I pick up speed. “Catch me if you can,” I call out over my shoulder, and I catch a glimpse of his smirk before I turn around.
“Al, you could at least make it challenging for me,” he says, and the sound of his skates scraping as they push off the ice makes it easy for me to hear how close he’s getting. I cut a sharp turn after hearing Jack behind me, and a laugh rumbles from his chest.
I slow down, glancing back at him. “That defeats the purpose of skating together this morning. You’re supposed to be taking it easy before your game tonight, and while I can’t skate faster than you, I am the better skater because I’m more efficient and controlled than you are.
“Al, I might not be able to do any of the fancy jumps and shit you can, but it doesn’t mean you’re the better skater.”
“Prove it then, pretty boy,” I say, scoffing. Whatever. If I were in my prime before I quit skating, I could beat Jack with my eyes closed.
I push off again, but this time, he catches up to me faster than before, and I anticipate him catching me moments before Jack’s arms wrap around my waist.
A yelp slips from me, and I grab onto his arms as he laughs, his chest shaking against my back through the thin sweatshirt I’m wearing. “Jack!” I exclaim, spinning in his arms to hit his chest.
“Al!” he mimics, feigning a falsetto voice, and I push out of his grip, laughing.
“That isn’t what I sound like.”
