It also surprised me that I had said it. But it was the truth. Being with him in the palace—that had become my home.
“Did you get your book?” I heard Stephanos ask Zalira. She glanced at me, and I felt a twinge of guilt that I’d asked Xander and my adelphia to lie about what we’d truly been after.
“We got everything we needed,” she told him.
I could see how much he wanted to embrace her, to assure himself that she was whole.
And how much she wanted that, too.
Rokh tried to speak to Ahyana, but she told him she wasn’t ready yet. She apologized for punching him and then said that she needed some time. He nodded but looked absolutely miserable.
“Has Luna come back yet?” I asked Xander.
“Your lizard has not made an appearance,” he told me.
Where was she? What was she doing? Why had she been gone for so long?
And what if she wasn’t coming back? What if she had discovered that she liked being out in the wild instead of inside the palace?
Or maybe her whole purpose had been to help us solve the scroll by giving us aether, and now that we had retrieved the greatest weapon ... perhaps the goddess had decided I no longer needed Luna.
I hoped not. I would really miss her.
“We should cross back as soon as possible,” Rokh said to the group. It was nearly twilight—it would be dark soon. I wanted to get away from this chasm. We needed to set up camp somewhere that we wouldn’t have to worry about another freak windstorm.
“What about Suri?” Ahyana asked.
“I’ll get her to wake up,” Io said. “I’ve got some spirit of hartshorn with me. It smells terrible, so I think it’ll work.”
“Some of the ropes snapped during the winds earlier,” Xander told me. “We’ve been reinforcing the bridge while you were gone.”
The tension in his voice was obvious. He was worried about me crossing again.
“You do not go last this time,” he demanded. “You follow right after me. We have two ropes tied to the far tree as additional safety precautions.”
I looked across the chasm and saw that it was just as he’d said—there were now two ropes tied to a large tree on the opposite side. Xander walked over to the ropes and picked them up. “I’m going first, you go second. And Stephanos is going to tie your knots this time.”
It was much easier to deal with his imperious tone now that I understood it was coming from a place of fear and concern.
“I’m going to be all right,” I assured him.
“After what happened with Lia last time, let me go first,” Dolion said to Xander with a smile. “Ilion can afford to lose me. You’re more valuable than I am.”
Xander shook his head. “I’m the heaviest, so I should be the one to go first, to test it out and make sure that it holds.”
“You don’t always have to do everything yourself. You can let others help carry the burden,” Dolion said.
As much as I disliked Dolion, he was right. Xander did take too much on himself. It was something he and I had discussed before.
In large part because I had the tendency to do the same thing myself.
“Fine,” my husband responded. “You can go. But I don’t like it.”
“You never do,” Dolion said cheerfully as he clasped Xander on the shoulder. Dolion tied the ropes around his waist and I went over to check on Suri.
“The spirit of hartshorn didn’t work,” Io said, sounding concerned. “She’s still passed out.”
Suri had expended a great deal of magic to help us escape from the cave. “She’s strong. She’ll wake up soon. If we have to wait until she does, we will.”
