“That definitely wasn’t going to happen,” she stated firmly, “even if we hadn’t agreed to sever all contact with each other, because I no longer trusted him. I know sleeping with a married man was wrong, and I paid for it when I sold my son.”
“You have to stop saying you sold your baby,” Kayana snapped angrily. “You’d become a surrogate, and you were paid to carry a baby to term and then give it to his parents.” She held up a hand when Cherie opened her mouth. “Please let me finish. It would have been the same if you’d donated an egg and Wills his sperm that, when fertilized, was implanted in your body. And you had a right to ask to be paid because you were deceived into becoming pregnant, and the duplicitous snake was made to pay for his deception.”
Cherie chewed her lip. “I know where you’re coming from, Kayana, but I can’t shake off the guilt that easily.”
“It’s a process,” Kayana said in a quiet voice. “If you’ve carried this guilt for five years, then you can’t expect to wake up one day and discover it’s no longer there.”
“I do know one thing. If I become pregnant again, I’m going to keep my baby, like Leah did with her sons.”
“I wish I’d had your strength, Cherie,” Leah said. “If I’d known what I was going to go through with Alan, I never would’ve married him. And he was as manipulative as your Wills. The first time I had a date with him, he promised to use his influence to get a teaching position for me at the school where, years later, I’d become the headmistress. He’d set up an interview for me, despite my being not much older than the students I would teach. When I got the notification that I’d been hired and I called to tell him, he suggested we go back to the inn where we’d had our first date and celebrate. The first time, he’d been the perfect gentleman, but that was to gain my confidence and before he’d morphed into predator mode. He ordered champagne, knowing I was too young to drink, and after several glasses, I was in no condition to tell him I didn’t want to have sex with him.
“So there’s no need for you to feel guilty about pimping his ass for money, jewelry, stocks, and your condo. You more than earned it for putting your life on hold to be at his beck and call. I was only nineteen when I married Alan, but it didn’t take long for me to discover his weaknesses. He wanted to be obeyed, and he also wanted his ego stroked, and I did that when I told him he had the best cock in the world. That really made him feel good because he knew I wasn’t a virgin when we first slept together.”
Cherie laughed hysterically. “Was he good?”
Leah sucked her teeth. “He was okay. Most times, I’d fantasize about making love with my old boyfriend, who looked like a nerd, but he was the complete opposite when it came to making love. He told me that his parents had had a maid who not only took his virginity, but taught him how to please a woman.”
“Good for you,” Cherie said, smiling. “It was different for me, because I had no one to compare Wills to.”
“What about Reese?” Kayana questioned.
Cherie waved her hand in the air as if she were in church testifying. “No comment.”
Kayana applauded. “You don’t have to give us any deets, but judging from this new and improved Cherie Thompson, I know Daddy must know what to do for you to blush whenever we mention his name.”
Leah slipped off her stool. “I forgot to bring your housewarming gifts in from the car.”
Cherie also stood up, thankful she didn’t have to go into detail about her and Reese. It was enough that she’d admitted they’d had unprotected sex. “Y’all know I don’t need anything.”
“We know, Miss Martha Stewart,” Leah quipped as she walked out of the kitchen.
Cherie shared a smile with Kayana. “I don’t know where I’d be without you and Leah.” There was a thread of sadness in her voice.
Kayana slipped on an apron over her blouse and jeans. “You’d be just where you are today, Cherie. There are times when we question why things happen to us, but I’m of the belief that they happen because they are supposed to, so we can move from one place or situation to another. You met and fell in love with a man who not only used you but had a hidden agenda. When I miscarried early in my pregnancy, I was truly devastated after the doctor told me I would never have children. He had to perform an emergency hysterectomy because they weren’t able to stop the bleeding. It left me depressed for a long time, until I realized I wasn’t less of a woman because I couldn’t bear children. There are women who opt never to become mothers, and they are quite content with their lives. James sleeping with another woman and getting her pregnant was the wake-up call for me to realize my marriage was on shaky ground and had been for a while. And it was the impetus I needed to take control of my life and return to my roots. If I hadn’t come back to Coates Island, I never would’ve met Graeme, and I know for certain that I never would’ve married again.”
Cherie nodded. “You’re right about my coming to Coates Island. I feel as if I’ve been reborn. Yesterday I got up early and walked along the shore to think about where I’d been and where I am now. I know in my gut I’m not ready for motherhood, but I did feel a little disappointed when I saw my period.”
“Don’t worry, Cherie. It’s all about timing. When the time is right, you’ll have your baby, and this time your baby’s father will be there for you.”
She sighed. “You really believe Reese and I are going to be together for the long run.”
Kayana angled her head. “I believe it even if you don’t want to. You deserve a lot of happiness after what you’ve had to go through. My grandmother used to say opportunity is like a bald-headed man. You must grab it as it’s coming toward you, or your hand will slip off and it’s gone forever. Reese Matthews is your opportunity for happiness, Cherie. Please don’t blow it by hiding things from him.”
Cherie wondered if Kayana was able to discern things about Reese that weren’t apparent to her. Kayana had grown up on Coates Island, and so had he, which meant she was more than familiar with him and his family. Then it was Leah’s reference to his interest in her even before they’d introduced themselves to each other. Was it because her friends were older, more worldly, and had had more experience with men than she had that made them more aware of the interactions between a man and a woman.
She’d noticed Reese looking at her whenever he entered the café, but so had the man that had attacked her. Cherie wasn’t vain when it came to what people claimed were her so-called exotic looks, but she knew men were drawn to her because on occasion they would ask if she was a Latina or mixed race, and her comeback would be that she was a black woman. Their curiosity as to her racial makeup stirred up her frustration with her mother because she’d refused to tell her about the man who had fathered her.
Leah returned, cradling a large, gift-wrapped box against her chest. “There’s one more in the car that I have to get.”
“I’ll come with you,” Cherie volunteered. She followed Leah out of the house to her car. She waved to Bettina, who was sitting on her porch knitting. Bettina returned the wave and went back to knitting. “I’m wondering whether I should invite her and her husband to join us,” she whispered to Leah.
Leah lifted another shopping bag from the trunk. “Are you friendly with her?”
“Not really. But I suspect she’s lonely. When I first moved in, she told me she was an empty nester, and now that her husband’s retired, he expects her to wait on him hand and foot.”
“If I were you, I would invite her, Cherie. Maybe being around other folks will make her feel better.”
“What about hubby?”
