I thought those words over and fell into a brief trance thinking about what they meant, and when I heard the alarm on my phone, it nearly made me jump out of my skin. Only as I was about to turn it off did I remember. “Shit! It’s six! Jack, why didn’t you say anything? I need to shower! Dinner’s at eight!”
I didn’t wait for his response before taking off down the hall. I managed to slide into the bathroom just before Sue, promising her I’d be in and out in no time. With a brush and a nail file, I tried frantically to scrape out the paint from under my nails. When I was done, I hurried back to the bedroom, where Jack had cleaned up my art supplies. That wasn’t like him. He must have realized what a rush we were in. He’d opened the sliding glass door to air out the room a bit. I was so busy digging through the dresser, I didn’t notice the cold creeping in until I was throwing on my bra, panties, and leggings.
Jack tried to calm me down: “You know, it’s fine if we show up late, they’re not going to shut the door in our face.”
“It’s Christmas, Jack! We can’t be late on Christmas!”
“Technically, Christmas is tomorrow. Today is Christmas Eve.”
I didn’t answer, because I was too busy trying to pull up my wool dress while Jack calmly slipped on his cracking sneakers and looked in the mirror to make sure his hair was sufficiently messy. Men! That was all he had to bother with. I pulled up my boots, grabbed my purse, ran back to the bathroom to throw on some makeup. Once again, I had to cut Sue off to do it.
“JENNIFER!” she shouted.
“I promise, it’ll just be a second this time.”
She nearly ran me over when I came out, begging Jack to put my toiletry bag in his backpack, because our suitcase was full. On my way out the door, I felt my heart skip a beat and shouted, “The charger! I almost forgot my charger!”
Jack waited patiently as I discovered another four or five things I’d almost left behind. When I was finally ready, it looked like we were going to be late.
Naya, sitting on the couch wrapped in blankets, shouted at us to have a good time. “Drink extra for me!” she added, and Will, sitting next to her, said, “Yeah, actually, don’t do that.”
The two of them would be having Christmas Eve dinner in the living room, with candlelight. Naya thought it was romantic. Will was so worn out, he was just happy not to have to leave the apartment.
Mike was going with us. He’d gone down to the garage early to smoke a cigarette before we left. Jack ordered him to put it out before he got in. We were going to the lake house. Agnes and Mary would be there. I assumed—I hoped—Mr. Ross wouldn’t.
Jack had told me I could invite my family. I thought better of it. Thingswere already tense enough in my life without bringing more problems onboard. I didn’t really know where Jack was at with his mother by this point, and with them there, anything could happen.
I had already been home once more, for my mother’s birthday, and it hadn’t been especially comfortable. Of all the people I talked to, the one who seemed most sane was my nephew Owen. He dressed me down for promising to come over the summer and changing my mind; he asked how Spot the stuffed horse was doing; and he told me that was the last toy I could ever steal from him. My conversations with my siblings and parents weren’t half as entertaining.
In the car, Mike asked if we could put on some music to pass the time, and if he could pick it. Jack didn’t answer, and when Mike reached for the dial, Jack swatted him away, putting on a boring classic rock station. Whenever a song he knew came on, Mike sang along at full volume.
In the time since we were last at the lake house, several lots had been sold nearby. Houses were going up, and Jack complained that it was turning into a subdivision. Soon all the peace and quiet would be gone.
“All good things must come to an end,” Mike said solemnly.
“Unlike you,” Jack said. “I assume you’ll be with us till the end of time.”
Mike ignored him, finally getting his way and changing the station.
When we arrived, Jack parked and unloaded our luggage. Mike dragged his suitcase carelessly through the snow, tracking mud onto the immaculate porch steps. Mary must have known who was ringing, because Mike was the only one who would have stood there pressing the button over and over.
“I heard you the first time,” she told her older son with a smile. They hugged just as Jack came up behind them.
“Hey, Mom,” Jack said, walking right past her.
“Jennifer!” his mother said when she saw me, and gave me a tight hug. “How are you? How are your grades? Jackie says you’ve been complaining about school.”
“I’m making it,” I said, which was true, though she’d probably hoped for a bit more enthusiasm. I noticed Mary was swaying a little, and she had a full glass of wine in her hand. Was she drunk? We’d only just arrived! I didn’t say anything, though, as I shut the door and walked through the vestibule and into the kitchen, where Agnes had taken a gigantic turkey from the oven and started spooning sauce over its golden skin. It looked delicious, and Mike was hovering around her, ready to steal a bite.
Agnes was usually warm, but today she was on a mission, and she waved at me vaguely before getting out the knife to carve it. I heard Jack murmur next to me, “I’m going to take our things upstairs.”
I followed a few feet behind him, wondering if he was planning on giving me the silent treatment the whole time we were there. I wasn’t sure how much longer I could take that from him, and to tell the truth, I didn’t think I deserved it. We were staying in his childhood bedroom again. When he tossed our luggage on the bed, I took out my contact lenses and put on my glasses. Jack left while I was doing it. I found him in the room at the end of the hall where I had seen his father once playing piano.
Should I have left him alone? Maybe he needed some space. But my worries got the better of me. “You OK?” I asked as I walked in.
His back was turned to me. I took a seat beside him and looked at him out of the corner of my eye.
After a moment, he asked, “Do you think it was a bad idea to leave the apartment in Will and Naya’s hands?”
