Hannah didn’t have much time to plan. They were shooting accusations back and forth so fast that it was all she could do to keep up. Maybe that was why she found herself speaking something very near the truth, instead of another lie.
Mr. Corbynwasall those things. It wasn’t fair for Mama to criticize him so harshly without even taking the time to know him.
“Iworry about you,” her mother cried, exasperated. “I’vebeen the one helping you, though you never see it. All of us have been. Youdon’t need to throw yourself after a common scoundrel to find love, Hannah. He’ll never give it to you.”
It shouldn’t upset her if Mama spoke of Mr. Corbyn with such disdain in her voice, or if she called him a ruffian or a scoundrel. After all, he wasn’t here to be hurt by it, so it was silly to be hurt on his behalf. It wasgoodthat Mama thought so little of him, for it was the only reason they weren’t being marched to the altar together at the end of a rifle. Hannah wasn’t sure why it troubled her.
I don’t want love,she reminded herself fiercely.I want a way out.
She drew herself up tall in her armchair. “Either I marry Mr. Corbyn, or I marry no one,” she announced, knowing full well the first option was impossible. “I won’t have any man but him.”
Check and mate. Let Mama try to bring her baronet to call now.
* * *
A note arrived for Silas bright and early the next morning.
I’m very sorry to trouble you, but I’m in a bit of a bind and it would be extraordinarily helpful if you could come by the house atexactlyquarter past eleven in the morning and declare your undying love for me. Don’t worry if they won’t admit you, just be sure to yell loudly enough that we can hear you indoors. I’ll leave a window open.
I’ll pay you double what I did last time!!
—H. Williams
Bold of her to presume I can read.
Silas had been educated as well as means would allow, his father having put all his hopes of social advancement into his firstborn son, but not many men of his station in life were so fortunate. MissWilliams couldn’t have known. He wasn’t sure if her thoughtless assumption that he was her mental equal was flattering or merely further proof of her naivete.
He glanced at the note again, then crumpled it up and tossed it in the rubbish bin. It might have been better if hecouldn’tread; it would have saved him from seeing such nonsense.
A hundred and twenty pounds to make an ass of himself. The sum was incredible enough to give him pause. If the woman was searching for ways to bankrupt herself, would it be so wrong to help her along? He could use the money.
Besides which, what if she truly needed his help?A bit of a bindcould mean anything. She’d been so rash before; who knew what she might do if Silas ignored her plea.
But if he turned up on Miss Williams’s doorstep, her brother would have little choice but to put a stop to the show. No. He wasn’t getting involved in this. The girl had a good family that seemed to care about her, which was more than could be said for most. And Silas had his pride.
Anyway, there were less humiliating ways to earn a living. He was going to see about some of them right now, in fact. It was only seven o’clock, but this was the best time to make his way to the dockyards, before the day’s work began. He set a hat upon his head and then he was off.
Of all the dockyards in town, St. Katherine’s and the adjacent London Docks were the ones nearest his modest lodgings in Southwark. As he drew nearer to his destination, the neighboring alleys seemed to grow more cluttered, the buildings a little sadder and more crooked. There were common lodging houses by the dozens proclaiming low rates for the dockers and watermen who worked nearby. Silas might easily have been forced to sleep here, in a run-down doss-house with twelve men to a room, if it weren’t for his prize money.
And Miss Williams’s sixty pounds, he reminded himself. Despite his misgivings, he couldn’t deny that the stack of banknotes she’d thrust in his hands yesterday bought him some comfort.
The shops had begun to take on a maritime character, and Silas assessed their potential as he walked. Here was a slopseller, the windows full of hammocks, flannel shirts, canvas trousers, and well-oiled sou’wester hats. Beyond that stood a tavern, and then a sack maker’s.
None of them seemed particularly promising, until Silas came upon a window full of bright brass instruments—sextants and chronometers and a large mariner’s compass.This might do.Navigation was one of the first things he’d learned as a cabin boy when his father had apprenticed him out to the navy. If he asked for work here, he would bring some skill with him.
The shop looked to be closed, but he could see movement inside. Silas raised his hand to knock on the door, but stalled in midair, unable to bring himself to do it.
Was he really going to beg for work in a shop?
He could just imagine what his father would say. Actually, there was no need to imagine. He’d already heard it when he’d arrived home after being discharged—the first time in thirteen years he’d set eyes on his parents.Have you any idea how much I’ve sacrificed to give you the chance to raise yourself up? And this is how you repay me, by bringing shame on our family name!
Silas sucked a breath in through clenched teeth. It didn’t matter what his father would think; they weren’t likely to see each other again. The old man had made that clear enough.
And why should Silas regret it? His parents were little more than strangers to him after so long at sea. He didn’t need them now; he was able to make his way alone.
If only he could bring himself to knock on the door first.
Silas lowered his fist. It wasn’t that he was still chasing his father’s approval—God knew he’d never been able to earn that, even before things went bad—but the sinking feeling in his gut told him this really was a fool’s errand. Even if Silas found work here, he would be nothing but a shopkeeper’s assistant, counting coin and delivering parcels. Wouldn’t it be smarter to find some enterprise he could make his own? His prize money and the winnings Miss Williams had given him weren’t enough to live on forever, but they could serve as a modest investment.
