Marriage, certainly. One didn’t spend half the night in a lady’s bedchamber and escape with no consequences. He would have to propose, and she would have to accept.
Regardless of what she wanted.
Good God, how did I manage this twice?He must be the unluckiest bastard alive.
If someone had asked Eli to describe what he looked for in awoman, the response would match Jane well. Intelligent, forthright, steadfast, and hiding a deep well of passion beneath the surface.
But all that was meaningless if they were only together because they’d been trapped. Eli barely knew how to imagine the life he wanted with her, only that it should look nothing like what he’d seen between his parents, or what he’d almost been forced to share with Cecily. He was wandering without a map.
There was a wall between them, and not only because Jane closed up every time he tried to talk about his past with her cousin. It was also a question of all the things she didn’t know. If she found out that he could have come home sooner, she would feel betrayed.
Jane valued her independence above all else. By seducing her last night, he might have robbed her of the chance to build the life that she wanted, without him in it. She would hate him for it.God, let there be some mistake. Let Cecily not know.
As they descended the balcony back to the grand floor, Lady Kerr tried to sidle up to Eli in the crowd.
“You look tired this morning, Eli. Were you up late last night?”
“Not at all,” he said a bit too sharply. “I took tea and retired early, as any of the servants could tell you.” He was in no mood for her games.
She started to ask, “Was Jane very unwell when you left? She seemed fine this—” But Eli didn’t let her finish the interrogation.
“You’d have to ask Miss Bishop how she feels; I couldn’t say. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve seen someone I must say goodbye to before we set out.”
It wasn’t strictly a lie, for he’d spotted Captain Powlett in the crowd. He left Lady Kerr’s side, suppressing the urge to run. This was a damned mess. She was the last person he wanted poking around.Had Jane been subjected to a similar intrusion this morning? That explained her ill humor.
Captain Powlett must have seen him at nearly the same moment, for he crossed the crowd to meet him. “Williams. So youarehere. I heard you attended the Pearsons’ ball last night, but I couldn’t find you.”
“I had to leave early. Have you enjoyed Ascot?”
“Very much. I’m glad I saw you before we left, though. I’ve been wanting to talk to you about something.” Powlett’s face took on a serious air.
“Yes, Captain?”
“I’ve been trying to write that letter of yours, but I keep thinking about what Miss Bishop said the other night, about the pirates not ransoming you. Itisodd. And we had no word of you for so long. It didn’t sit right with me.” Powlett had always been a direct man. When he had a problem with an inferior on board theLibertas, they knew about it. This was no different. He reached into his coat and produced a folded sheet of paper. “This is a copy of a letter I’ve written to the lords commissioners to inform them of my concerns.”
Not to Somerset House. This wasn’t anything to do with annulling his death certificate.
The lords commissioners of the admiralty handled naval crimes.
Eli kept his voice perfectly neutral as he replied. “I see.”
Captain Powlett shifted his posture but didn’t avoid Eli’s gaze. “I thought it only fair that you should see exactly what I’ve said. I’m not one to go behind a man’s back.”
“I appreciate your honesty, Captain, but I’d much prefer the opportunity to settle this between us, if possible. Could I call on you in town tomorrow to discuss it?” He wasn’t sure what he would say to persuade Powlett not to take the matter any higher up the chain, but he would have the coach ride home to come up with something.
“You’re welcome to call if you like, but the letter is already in thepost. I have a duty not to hide my suspicions from the navy. It will be for the lords commissioners to decide if they’ll convene a court-martial, not I. If you have nothing to hide, I’m sure they’ll be satisfied with your explanations and the matter will end there.”
This would have been more reassuring if Eli didn’t have a great deal to hide. He couldn’t make any explanation to the lords commissioners without committing perjury, which would only add to his charges.
Well, he would face this with dignity, whatever it brought. His solicitor had warned him, hadn’t he? He couldn’t claim he hadn’t known. And anyway, there was no need to panic. It was only a letter. Nothing more.
Eli took the envelope reluctantly. He both wanted and dreaded to open it. But not here, with half the ton about.
“Do you still have your McArthur?” Captain Powlett asked.
The manual of court-martial procedure was commonly read to the crew at sea along with the articles of war, so that they might know their duties. Eli knew how courts-martial worked. He’d even witnessed a half dozen. But it was one thing to sit in silent observation, quite another thing to conduct his own defense, if matters should come to that.
“I can easily get one.”
