“Of course you can,” I reply, moving to put myself between Dolian and the door that leads to Rhea. I can’t say why I do it—he has never hurt me beyond the use of words—and yet, as I stare into the same hazel eyes that Conrad has, I can’t read his intentions. All emotion is stricken from his face except for the air of superiority he wears like a mask. So different from the man I used to know. “I just thought you were with Conrad.”
At his brother’s name, Dolian frowns, and I fight back the urge to shout at him for it. It has beenyearssince he and I were anything more than just friends, and eventhatwas fleeting. Conrad may have been the catalyst for the termination of whatever relationship we could have had, but in the end, it was the right decision. Dolian and I were never compatible in the way I yearned for. In the way hedeserved. “You don’t have to be with him.”
I rock back a step at the desperation in his voice, the eager way his eyes gleam as he stares at me. Panic tightens like a vice around my throat when he steps nearer, a hand reaching out to grab one of mine. “What do you mean?”
“I’ve figured out a way for us to be together. Free of Conrad’s rule.” Though his grip on me remains soft, it is unrelenting. Atthe look on my face, he steps close enough for his chest to brush against mine, his breath stirring the hairs along my temples.
“Stop,” I rasp, attempting to put space between us only for him to immediately fill it.
“Do you want me to beg, Luna? Is that what you need for me to prove myself to you?” He drops down onto his knees, his grip on my hand tightening as he looks up at me with pleading eyes. Behind me, I think I hear Rhea stir, but my heart beats so loudly in my ears that I can’t be sure. “We can still have everything we dreamed about. All those conversations about freedom and desire—it can all be ours.”
My heart clenches at the desperation in his tone, even as warning bells ring in my head. “Dolian, that was a different time.Wewere different. You and I can never be.”
“But we can. I know that what we had was short, but you are the only person who I’ve ever felt completelysafewith. And I have had to watch for years as Conrad cocooned you away from everyone else just sohecould have you!”
“Is that what you think?” I snap, tugging on his hand to get him to stand. He does, but he sticks close enough for me to see the faint freckles that dot his cheeks. “Conrad and I may have had a rough beginning, but Ichosehim.”
“No—”
“Yes!” I hiss, just as a fussy cry sounds through the open door. Inhaling a deep breath, I slowly release it through my nose. “I love Conrad. We have a daughter together and—”
“You love him?” he interrupts, the air growing thick. At my nod, a breath shudders from him, and finally the mask drops, revealing a flash of regret followed by one of unrelenting fury. “You could have beenmyqueen,” he says raggedly, a hand diving into his hair as stares at me. “You could have beenmine!” His shout reverberates, making Rhea cry louder as every instinct within me begs to go to her.
I retreat a step, bringing my hands out in front of me as I call on my magic for the first time inyears. I feel it stir somewhere distantly, as if it has been placed behind a hundred locked doors.The tincture. I had taken it so I wouldn’t accidentally draw on my power while giving birth. Pain flares behind my ribs as my heart pounds, my mouth growing dry. And Dolian… he knows about my magic. About the curse I viewed it as. He sees the way I try to draw on it now, and I watch as he strengthens his defenses behind that building rage. And for the first time since I met him, I’mterrifiedby what I see.
“Guards!” I scream, and take another step back.
“You would have them apprehend me? Simply forloving you?”
“This is not love. This is something else—somethingtwisted.” Though my voice shakes, I keep my hands drawn out in front of me. “Go. Before Conrad returns. He will punish you for being here not as your brother but as yourking.”
Dolian blinks, and then he’s impossible to read again, his steps sure as he marches towards me. “I’m afraid Conrad’s been relieved of those duties.”
My back hits the frame of the door, and I don’t give myself time to register what Dolian has said before I turn and sprint into the bedroom.
“Luna!” he shouts, his steps vibrating over the floor as he runs after me. The room feels too big, and each step is like trudging through honey, my body still recovering from birth. Dolian’s hand closes around my arm, and something sharp pierces my lower back, pain flaring and making me scream. I stumble into him as the pressure surrounding the pain releases, something wet and warm coating my back. Dolian’s hand tightens on my arm.
“What are you doing?” I ask, calling on my magic again only to have a hollow silence answer. Dolian flashes a knife in front ofme, my blood coating it as my knees wobble beneath my weight. I try to tug out of his hold, my gaze shifting to Rhea, her small hands reaching above the edge of the cot, fingers curling open then closed as she cries.
“It didn’t have to be this way,” he growls, and a scream tears up my throat when he plunges the blade into my shoulder. Once, then twice. I collapse to the ground, blood already dripping down my arm as I begin to crawl.
Gods, do not harm her. Please, help me.I had never imagined what I might look like as a mother before becoming pregnant. My spirit was a wild one—one that called for adventure and freedom. Children had always been the symbol of a slower life, of surrendering to someone else’s schedule. But, as I stared into my daughter’s eyes after her birth, a knowing filled me. Being a mother could be whateverIdefined it as. Whatever Rhea needed me to be. I would doanythingto protect her. To make her happy. To see herlive.
My head slams against the ground as Dolian flips me over, his knees bracketing my hips. Silver moonlight paints his face in a horrifying glow, my blood speckled over his skin like a macabre collection of new freckles.
“Don’t hurt her,” I wheeze between gurgled breaths, the taste of iron blooming over my tongue. “Rhea is—” He drives the blade down into my stomach.Protect her. Protect her. Protect her.My hands catch his wrists, his silhouette blurring as he bares his teeth at me.
“It didn’t have to be this way! You madethisthe only option!”
The ceiling above him spins, shadows swirling in from the edges of my vision, and still, I grip his wrists. I dig my nails into his flesh.If there are any gods listening, please help me. Dolian shakes free of my hold, my fingers and toes tingling as my arms fall lifelessly to my sides.
The darkness above grows, sweeping in as Dolian raises his hands again, the dagger glinting against the night stars behind him. “I love you, Luna, and because of that love, I will make this next part quick.” His scream echoes out as his arms begin to descend, Rhea’s cries drawing my head in her direction, a whisper of her name passing my lips.Protect her. In my ear, someone whispers, their voice deep and resonant as warmth presses at my chest and white light flares behind my lids.
Protect her. Protect her. Protect her.
Part One
Naivety might have been a cloak which I could hide beneath before, but I refuse to let it be one now.
