The truth of my words stung her as much as it did me. A reminder of what we’d both given up in our pursuit of revenge. I’d been willing to give it all up until the shadow of my father had destroyed everything. And here I was wishing there had been some other way because, if given the chance, I would have done it differently. I would have made the life I wanted with thewoman who still owned my heart and the child we would have raised together. But it was too late, and now I made my life with nothing but loneliness, scotch, and more money than I’d ever spend in a lifetime.
I didn’t know what I was doing standing outside Tori’s door again. Or why I hadn’t let Tina tell her about the interview with Liv. A need to explain my reasoning, to convince her to take the job I knew I would offer her, ruled my decision. My reasons for wanting to give her the job were selfish. I wanted her there, to see her every day even if she couldn’t be mine. I knew it would be torment, but I deserved it for everything I’d done to her. And then there was our son. A boy I didn’t know but wanted to because I had seen myself in his eyes the last time I’d seen him. The younger version of me, before the abuse and trauma had infected my life.
The door opened, and Tori’s smile faltered. “I knew I should have checked out earlier. I thought I made it clear this morning was goodbye. It’s more than you gave me.”
The jab stung, and my hard exterior cracked some. But then, Tori had a way of fracturing it, just like she had when I fell for her. She had brought out the man I wanted to be. Not the one driven with revenge, hard and cold.
“May I come in?”
“Asking this time? So polite. I guess I know how you got my room number. Perks of being the owner?”
“Something like that.” I waited for her to open the door further, and for a moment, I didn’t think she would.
“Mommy, can I take my cars on the trip?”
Tori turned her attention to the voice. Our son’s voice. A tingling sensation formed in my gut.
“Just one. Pack the others up.”
“You’re packing?” I said, walking into the opening she’d unintentionally given me when she’d moved from the door.
“Hi!” If anything could have soothed the turmoil in me, that tiny voice could.
“Hi there.”
Tori looked between us, her eyes growing sad before she said, “Reid, that’s enough for tonight. Go brush your teeth and put your pajamas on. I’ll be in to tuck you in soon.”
“Can I look at my book while I wait?”
She stooped in front of him and brushed his hair from his face, and my heart swelled. This is what I’d missed. What I’d given up, and that hurt more than anything. Giving him a kiss on the head, she answered, “Of course you can.”
“Yay! Bye, mister.”
He ran off, closing the door behind him and leaving us alone again. I dragged my eyes from where he’d run to and met Tori’s.
“We’re checking out in the morning.”
“No.” I blurted the word before even thinking.
Head cocked, she put her hands on her hips. “No? You don’t have any say in what I do. You gave that up when you left me two months before our wedding.”
She turned her back on me and folded a small blanket with sports cars on it.
“Stay. Please. You have another interview tomorrow with Olivia.”
Her gaze snapped to me. “Olivia…your sister? The sister you don’t get along with and who lives out west somewhere? Oh, how the lies are coming back to bite you.”
I rubbed my temple, knowing I’d done this to myself. “I had no choice but to lie.”
“You had a choice, and you chose to lie. Just like you chose to leave me. Was anything we had real?” Her brows scrunched, eyes turning a rich navy as they pleaded for me to say there was.
“Us. We were real. My feelings for you were real, and everything we had together was real. I never lied to you about any of it.”
“Yet you did. I don’t know who you are, Gabe. William. God, I don’t even know what to call you.”
“Gabe. I hate William. It’s my father’s name, and he insisted I use it, but my mother called me Gabe, as does anyone I care about.”
Her features softened, but the divide between us was so large I didn’t know how to cross it. Or if I had any right to ask to cross it.
