“Mav, buddy, give it a rest,” I said as I looked at him. He was standing on the couch, ears perked, staring intently at the door behind me.
Another rumble of thunder.
Another bark.
I reached over and scratched behind his ear, then patted my thigh. “Come on, lie down.” He listened, begrudgingly, letting out another low growl as he sank onto my lap.
As I sat there listening to the storm outside, my mind couldn’t stay off of Haley.
I felt awful about what I’d said to her on Saturday. I’d been tangled in the rush of realizing I was in love with her, and I’dbeen desperately trying to figure out how to navigate it. Then that patient came in. We were opposites in so many ways, but all I could focus on were those tiny, glaring similarities we did have. And it fucked with me.
Not being able to get that man to accept help gnawed at me. That failure bled into how I treated Haley, fueling an ache I dumped on her. That wasn’t a justification for how I lashed out at her or what I’d said. None at all.
I’d done what she said—taken a few days to battle my thoughts and piece together my next move. I told her we needed to talk...because wedid. And I was on edge and nervous.
I was anxious for her to come back…because I planned to tell her how I felt.
That I was all in.
That Iwantedto be with her.
That Ilovedher.
Was I still terrified?Absolutely. Forseveralreasons. But in the past few days, while clearing my head, I kept circling back to one thing. Every thought—good or bad—led to the same conclusion. My heartneededHaley.
That ultimately outweighed any lingering reservations and fears I had.
My thoughts were broken by the chime of my phone ringing on the coffee table. I saw the number for the ER flashing across the screen, and I grabbed it.
“Hello?”
“Hey, it’s Marie. Did Haley leave yet?”
A cold wave of dread instantly slammed into my chest.
“She—She left thirty minutes ago.” The air thinned.She should be there by now.
“She’s not here yet,” Marie said, and I could hear the tinge of worry in her voice.
Panic gripped me. “Have you tried calling–”
“She’s not answering her phone.”
Fuck.
I barely remembered moving, adrenaline and dread propelling me toward the door. “I’m going out to look for her. Don’t stop calling, and let me know the second you hear anything.”
I didn’t wait for a response. I hung up, slipped my shoes on, grabbed my coat, and picked up my keys.
I was out the door a second later.
My grip on the steering wheel was tight as I drove away from my house. I navigated the rain-slick roads, fighting against the gusting wind with my wipers going at full speed to combat the heavy rain.
Regret knotted inside me with every mile. I never should have let her leave. I should have insisted on driving her, even though I knew she would have argued against it. I would have won in the end, even if she was pissed about it.
A heavy gust of wind shifted my Jeep to the right as I turned onto the main road toward town. I straightened my wheel and regained control. I was hoping she just pulled over somewhere, waiting for the rain to let up a little.
My eyes darted back and forth, searching foranysign of her car.
