“I am not certain that she can be wooed at all, my lord,” Fenella said. “She told me to tell you if you cannot treat her with respect she must leave Dunglais. You cannot let her go, for that would break Fiona’s heart. The wee lass has had enough sadness in her life without losing the only mother figure she knows or can remember. You must satisfy your manly urges somewhere else,” Fenella concluded.
“Nay, I will have Alix,” he replied softly, “but when I do, she will come to me willingly. I would not harm my daughter’s happiness, but I will not deny myself the prize I want.”
“Offer her marriage,” Fenella suggested wickedly.
“If her distaste for carnal union is as strong as you say it is, that would but terrify her further,” Malcolm Scott said. “Nay, kinswoman, Alix needs to be wooed with kindness and gentleness, for she has never before been wooed.”
“Be careful, my lord,” Fenella cautioned him. “If not for Alix’s sake then for Fiona’s. She has come to love her companion well.”
At that moment the little girl came to join them. “Is Alix well now, Fenella?” she asked innocently.
“She will be on the morrow, lass,” Fenella said. “But ’tis your bedtime. I will take you since Alix cannot. You will see her in the morning.” She took the child’s hand and led her from the hall.
Malcolm Scott went to the sideboard and poured himself a dram of his own whiskey. Then he went to sit by the fire and consider what Fenella had told him. What the hell was the matter with a man that he would treat his wife cruelly in their bed? And what cruelty had he inflicted upon her? She was a beautiful young woman of respectable breeding who had been given to the Englishman as a bride. Could he not have enjoyed her favors as well as that of his mistress? Was it necessary to punish her for not being the wife he wanted? Most men never got the wife they wanted. They got the wife who was given to them. He had taken the wife he wanted, and look how well that had turned out. But he could not imagine being cruel to any woman. He had certainly never been cruel to Robena. If he could have saved her, he would have.I will go slowly with Alix, he told himself. She deserved to know how sweet passion can be when it is shared between two consenting parties.I will win her over, and sooner than later.
In the days that followed, the laird’s behavior returned to that which it had been before he had revealed his desire for Alix to her. She was wary of him, but as February ended and March began she grew less so. And then one evening as she returned to the hall to oversee the closing up of the house for the day he called to her.
“Fetch a goblet, Mistress Alix, and sit with me by the fire,” he invited.
Alix did not know why she accepted his invitation, but it seemed more the plea of a lonely man in need of a friend than it did a lustful man attempting to seduce a female. She poured some wine into a cup and came to sit with him. “I smelled spring in the air today,” she said with a small smile. “And the lambs in the paddock are more frolicsome.”
“Spring has not failed us yet,” he agreed. “I would apologize to you, Alix.”
“Apologize? For what need you beg my pardon, my lord?”
“Some weeks back I frightened you, and for that I am sorry,” the laird said.
Alix stiffened. “My lord, I am so happy as Fiona’s companion and teacher. I would want nothing to spoil that.”
“I will not spoil it,” he promised her. “But I would have you tell me why you would find my attentions so repellent.”
Her first thought was to leave him then and there, but she did not. Alix realized the laird, like most men, had been puzzled why she would not want his favors. He was a handsome man, a propertied man, all the things that women were supposed to admire in a gentleman. “My marriage, as you know, my lord, was not a happy one,” Alix began. “I am not unhappy being without a husband.”
“And I am not unhappy being wifeless,” he admitted.
“Yet you would have had me in your bed were I willing,” Alix responded.
He nodded. “Aye, I would.” The laird smiled a small smile.
“You are insulted that I refused you,” Alix said.
“I am curious why you refused me,” he answered her. “Will you tell me why?”
Alix considered his request. He was, she suspected, the kind of man who would not be content until she had told him the truth. But if she told him the truth then he was apt to leave her in peace and seek his pleasure elsewhere. The shame in what had happened between her and Hayle Watteson was not her shame. It had been her husband’s. Alix sighed, and then she began to speak.
“He hated me for not being the girl he loved. Maida was her name. Because it was necessary, he bedded me else the marriage be annulled, because that would have displeased his father mightily. He used me as a man uses a woman. But there was no kindness in it. The room was always in total darkness because he felt guilt at what he believed was a betrayal of his Maida. He did not want to look upon me in those brief moments. He took my virginity quickly, cruelly, then left me alone in that black chamber. And each time our coupling was swiftly accomplished so he might depart and return to the woman he loved. I am only fortunate I did not conceive his child.” Alix did not bother to tell the laird how her own father had protected her from that disaster. “I found our time together unpleasant, and I did not like the coupling. My father told me that it is beautiful with someone you love, but I do not think I will take the chance of being hurt and degraded again. I don’t want to be any man’s wife again.”
Malcolm Scott nodded. The shock of what she had just told him actually hurt him. As he had previously thought, her husband was a fool. She was young, beautiful, and eager to be loved. The man’s treatment of her had been nothing short of barbaric. “I believe I might change your outlook of passion between a man and a woman,” he began slowly, “but I should certainly not force myself upon you.”
“I know naught of passion, my lord,” Alix replied.
“And there is the tragedy,” he told her as he engaged her eyes with his. “Can you give me your trust, Alix? Can you believe I will not harm you if I say it?”
“What do you want of me, my lord?” she asked him, realizing suddenly she was no longer afraid of him even though it was dangerous ground upon which they trod.
“To show you how sweet passion can be,” he said. Then, “Give me your hand.”
Alix complied with the simple request, curious as to what he would do.
