It had been a couple of hours since she left. I told myself I wasn’t keeping track, but I knew exactly how long she’d been gone. I’d checked the clock three times. I’d looked out the window once or twice, just to see if she was back. But she wasn’t. She was still out there, probably reading in whatever park she thought was worthy enough of her presence today.
Truthfully, it was a blessing being around her. The calmness she radiated had often kept me calm when all I wanted to do was shout at people. Of course, Lana knew nothing about the way I felt, and I would never admit to it.
I sat at the kitchen counter with my phone in one hand and a half-empty cup of coffee in the other. I didn’t feel likeworking today, and I also had no intention of having anyone over for the weekend. I was tired, and even my social battery would occasionally run out.
When a call from Rocco came in, I just stared at the screen, trying to figure out if I had enough energy to talk to my best friend.
But if I’d had let him go to voicemail, he’d show up at my door ten minutes later.
I sighed and picked up, putting him on speaker so I could continue to scroll through my social media apps aimlessly.
“You alive?” he asked, his voice as cheerful as ever.
“Barely.”
“That’s good enough,” he said. “Listen, I got something. We’re putting together a new video series. The studio wants a small cast, just a few new girls. They want you to pick the girls. You’re good at spotting the ones who’ll actually be good on camera.”
I rubbed my temple and leaned back in my chair. “You got anyone in mind already?”
I didn’t have the time to visit the studio we worked with to personally meet all the new faces who wanted to make a name for themselves in the industry. There’d be too many, and not even a fifth would make it big.
“A couple of brunettes, a blonde, and a redhead. I just sent you the pictures. The redhead’s cute as hell, probably twenty-one. Got that shy look you like.”
I got his message and opened it. There were headshots but also a couple of professionally shot nudes, and I looked at them half-interested until I got to the redhead.
“Hm, yeah. I can work with the redhead.”
Rocco snorted. “Of course. You always go for the redheads.”
“They work well on camera,” I said flatly.
“Yeah, sure. And it’s totally not because you’ve got a certain redhead living under your roof that you’ve been secretly lusting after.”
“Don’t start,” I warned.
“I’m just saying,” he said, trying not to laugh. “I’ve seen you look at her with that hungry look. She’s innocent.”
Too damn innocent. And pure. And smart.
God, too damn smart for me to use her face to get off.
“You’ve been different lately,” Rocco continued. “You don’t even hit the clubs anymore. The other night, Xena told me she called you, and you didn’t pick up. That’s a first. You always pick up when sweet Xena calls.”
“I was busy.”
“Doing what? Folding laundry?” he snorted.
“Filming with Karlee.”
“Right, and how’s that working out for you?”
He knew Karlee was difficult. She was demanding, clingy, and jealous, which, in this industry, wasn’t very fitting.
I didn’t answer because I would’ve only made excuses. I had also become a bit lazy since, well…since my dick didn’t work the way it used to.
He sighed. “Look, man, whatever’s going on, maybe use it. Put it into the work. Write something new. You used to actually give a damn about the stories.”
I sighed. “Yeah. I used to.”
