My breathing hitched. My brain disconnected. I suddenly had to pee again—or maybe throw up. Hell, I didn’t know what my body wanted to do.No brain connectivity, remember?
I must’ve gone pale, because Amber rushed over and placed her hand gently on my lower back—the same protective mom move your mama does when she brakes too hard in the car, like her little hand would stop you from flying through the windshield.
Holding up the test, tears streamed down my face as the wordPregnantstared back at me from the screen. I didn’t move. The room was so silent I could hear the vents humming—which was damn near impossible, because they were practically soundless.
Then, it hit me all at once. My chest tightened. My heart pounded so hard it hurt. My vision cleared, and it felt like I was watching God drop the mic at the end of His comedy show—The joke was on me.
Amber gasped. “Oh. My. Goodness.”
“This can’t be right,” I whispered. “Maybe it’s expired.”
Amber pulled the box from her scrub pocket. “Bitch, it expiresnext year.” She looked at me and grinned through wide eyes. “Mahasin… you’re pregnant.”
I laughed then—one short, broken sound. “This is insane.”
Amber wrapped her arms around me. “You, okay?”
I went off, finally letting it all out. “Hell nah, I ain’t okay. I’m fucked, Amber. How am I going to explain this to my parents? To colleagues and all those uppity bastards my father forces us to have dinner with. What do I say, huh? That I was so heartbroken after my ex-fiancé’s wife confronted us, that a few weeks later I busted it open for a real nigga? One Iplannedon never seeing again? Hellnah, I ain’t okay.”
“Mahasin, breathe,” she said, letting me go and rubbing my back. But I pulled away and started pacing between my office and the bathroom.
“Here I am delivering babies every week, and now I’m standing here crying—still wondering how this happened, like I don’t know biology—and feeling trapped, like I don’t know I got options,” I continued, words flying faster than my thoughts could catch them.
Amber looked at me with calm, kind eyes. “You’re just still in shock, Mahasin. This doesn’t take away from who you are or what you’ve accomplished. And yes, you have options—but we’ve got to consider them quickly. Judging by Aunt Rose and the size of your stomach, we might have to go through a full procedure.”
“We?” I repeated softly, eyes still brimming with tears.
“Yes,we.You and I. I’m here, every step of the way, as much as you’ll let me be. I can’t take on the emotional weight or make the choices for you, but I’m riding with you through the healing process—whether it’s eight weeks or eighteen years.”
We both snickered at the thought of raising a kid together for the next eighteen years.
“Thank you, Ambs. And I’m holding you to the whole eighteen,” I smiled.
Her face lit up with joy. “You’re gonna keep it?”
“I am.” I nodded. The shock and fear were still there, sitting right at the surface—but underneath was something warm and steady. Like maybe, just maybe, life was giving me something sweet without the sour.
Amber grinned, her own eyes glossed over. “You’re going to be an amazing mother. You’ve got a solid-ass career, you’re one of the most loving people I know, and bitch—you come from that old money.” We laughed in unison at that last part.
“My niece or nephew gonna show up to kindergarten in a limo and rock an AP on their fat little wrist.”
I laughed again—louder, freer this time. “My parents are going tolose it.My mama is going to hover over me, watching everything I eat. And my daddy? Oh, forget it. He’s probably already enrolling the baby in a charter schoolin utero.”
Amber wiped her cheeks. “Your baby shower is going to be a whole block party.”
I rubbed my stomach gently. “Maybe this is how it’s supposed to happen. I’ve spent all this time trying to find someone to love me right, love me forever—and maybe the love I was looking for wasn’t meant to walk into my life. Maybe I was supposed togive life to it.”
Amber hugged me tight. “That’s beautiful, sis. But… you know we gotta find him, right? Gage deserves to know he’s got a baby on the way.”
The warmth inside me shifted—morphed into anxiety. Suddenly I had to pee again… or throw up. His name soundedtauntingon her lips. The gentle giant I gave my body to… would he reject me? Or worse, reject our child?
“Yeah,” I said quietly. “He should know.”
“You got his number?”
I shook my head. “No. But I remember enough—his name, the studio he mentioned, the show he was producing… oh, and his address.”
Amber finger-snapped. “Good job, hoe. We’ll start with the house. And if he acts stupid, we pop up at his job and wreck that whole damn set.”
